Anything But Ordinary
by Exeterra
Summary: They think i am strange. I am not strange. They are strange. They are not like me. They do not see the numbers.
1. Shinigami Eyes

**Okay, let's see…. I do not own Deathnote or Vampire Knight or any of the contents…I do, however, own**** Lilith Carmen Hyukamen, Aderyn Luna Sumihane, and Seth Loki Yaneko. Well, and minor other people like I might make up a Shinigami or two, and the OC's families and Mary Ann. I think that's all. Oh and by the way, if I don't capture everything perfectly, sorry. And I might change a few things. Deal with it. And all the usual crap. Enjoy.**

_July 12_

_Hello, my name is Lilith.. This is my diary. I got it when I was one and it was for my birthday from my mom who is dead. I never wrote in it before but I think I will start. I need to tell someone these things that haunt my mind. I cannot tell anyone, not even my dad. He does not like me. He does not care. He is always drunk because he has too much alcohol. He beats me when I am bad. I am never bad._

_It is very strange for me to go places. I can see little numbers over peoples heads, and their names. I thought everyone could do that. I asked my friend once what the number over my head was, because I cant see my own name and number. She laughed nervously and told me she didn't feel like playing that game. I don't think other people can see the numbers._

_However, I am twelve and I do not play pretend anymore. I really can see numbers. And I can grow wings when I want to. They come out of my back, and when I want them to go away they shrink until they aren't there anymore. And I can turn invisible, so people don't see me when I'm flying._

_I can see strange people that others don't see. They are sometimes scary and sometimes funny. Lots of them have wings like me. I think they see the numbers too because they are always looking just above people's heads. They are strange. They seem surprised that I can see them._

_One of them likes to talk to me and his name is Ryuk. He has a somewhat scary face at first but I am used to it. I like him. He is funny and very nice to me. No one else likes me anymore. My friend (the one I told about the numbers) told everyone and now they think I am weird. I am not weird. They are all weird because they are not like me. I am a stranger on this world. I do not belong here, I think._

_My mother died before I turned one year old. The notebook was given to me by my mother's friend Mary Ann Williams. She is very nice. I have not seen her in four years now. I wish she would come back and take me away from this place. I do not belong here._

I closed the diary and threw it on the bed. I didn't feel like writing any more. Then, on a second thought (I didn't want my dad finding it) I walked over to my desk. It was faded and the paint was mostly peeled off, like everything else in my dingy house. There were coffee cup stains on the top. There were no working phones or lights in our house. I had to pay the rent because my father never remembered and he didn't work either. I had to work as a cashier after school to make enough money to live here, but I didn't have many possessions and couldn't afford electricity or phone bills.

My desk had a large mirror attached to the back. I flipped the mirror around and pulled off the back. I put my diary in the little space and pushed the back of the mirror back on. There. I doubted my drunken father would find it there. As I flipped the mirror back around, I caught sight of myself in the stained mirror. Long brown hair in need of a trim, tall, thin body. Hmm. My eyes were brown today. They changed sometimes.

I walked over to my small window and pulled up the window pane. I barely fit through the tiny hole, mostly because of all my arms and legs. I was lucky to be so slim—mostly because I didn't eat much. I couldn't afford to eat too much.

I slid down the angular roof and became invisible. I extended my large, black, ragged wings and glided to the ground. As I trotted down the street, Ryuk fell into step beside me.

"Hi, Ryuk," I said, sighing.

"Why the long face?" he asked, grinning with his unusually wide mouth.

"Oh, nothing," I said dismissively, mustering a smile. "So how's life?"

"Well, let's put it this way. It'll get much more interesting in…four minutes and twenty-two seconds."

I didn't bother trying to figure that out. I knew there was only about a five percent chance I would figure it out before four minutes and twenty two seconds was over, so I didn't bother.

We walked in silence for a while, before I said, "Ryuk? Can I ask you something?"

"I sure can't stop you," he said.

"Okay. Answer as honestly as you can?"

"I guess…you know I wouldn't do this for just anyone, but I like you. You're smart, for a human."

"Um…Ryuk, can you see the numbers over peoples' heads?" I blurted.

He stopped. "Y—you can…see them?" he asked. "You mean, you have Shinigami eyes?!"

"What?!"

"Well, I suppose I should have expected it—you can choose not to show yourself to certain people, you have wings…I never expected you would have the eyes…wait, how'd you know I could see the numbers?"

"Well," I said, "you're always looking above people's heads."

"Wow, you're observant!" he said. "So you know, the numbers tell you when a person is going to die, and when they were born. You can see their whole life. Plus you see their name."

"Yes, I knew that," I replied. "The name part I mean."

"Oh, by the way, Mary Ann Williams just died."

"WHAT?! Are you JOKING?! RYUK, WHAT…"

"You wrote her name in your Deathnote. Wait here, I'll show you."

He flew back in the direction of my house. He returned seconds later with my diary.

"HEY! THAT'S PRIVATE!!" I yelled.

"Look, he said, and held it out. He started scratching the cover, and black paint started flaking off.

"I don't want that to start looking like the rest of my house," I said warningly.

He silently held it out. In the cover was carved: Death Note.

"This used to be one of mine, but I got a new one." He turned so I could see another book attached to his belt. "I lose my Notes a lot…"

"I don't…want Mary Ann to be dead!!!" I was practically hyperventilating.

"Here," he said, handing me an eraser. "It's a Death Eraser…use it to erase the names you wrote, and they'll come back to life."

"GIMME THAT!" I screamed, and grabbed my diary. I spread my wings and flew away at top speed.

"LILITH," he called. "DON'T WRITE YOUR OWN NAME, WHATEVER YOU DO!!!"

I didn't listen. This was too much for me. I flew until I was so tired I could feel my wings wanting to retract. They did that when I was tired. My invisibility was slipping too.

I glided down into an alley and let my wings retract and became visible. I stepped out of the alley.

I didn't recognize anything. I realized I didn't know where I had come from or where I was going. I cursed my stupidity. I looked down. My hand was clenched around my diary…and the eraser. Well, it couldn't hurt…I erased Mary Ann's name from the Note. As an afterthought, I erased mine too. Couldn't be too safe.

I started walking. I shoved the eraser in my pocket and clutched the Note close to my chest. It didn't matter since no one was around. It was summer, but it was getting dark and it was chilly in the shade. There was a lot of shade between the tall, faded buildings. This town seemed like it was deserted.

Suddenly, I saw movement from the corner of my eye. I turned, and saw nothing. I kept walking, more warily.

Suddenly, something flew into my side, making me fall and knocking the wind out of me. While I was getting my breath, a dark shape towered over me.

"Ryuk?" I gasped weakly.

A cold laugh filled the air. "No," said the cold voice. "I am not your little friend. Little girl, are you lost?"

Te friendly tone was at odds with his cold voice. My vision was blurred and I could not see well.  
"N—no…"

"May I…drink your blood?" he asked. I would have screamed but I still hardly had any breath. I gasped and tried to move. I tried to get up, but I was so out of breath, I couldn't breathe…

I felt the man's cold hands close around my shoulders. I tried weakly to fight, but he was strong. I felt him breathing against my neck.

Then there was only the teeth. His teeth dug repeatedly into my neck, over and over…there was only pain. And blood. Everything was red with blood. My blood.


	2. Cross Academy Infirmary

**Mmkay, chapter two…same disclaimer, blah blah blah lets go :)**

I could hardly see…my vision went between blurred and blackness. And those horrible bursts of clarity, where I could see everything…covered in my blood, and the vampire…no, I needed strength…just one second…

I screamed and threw open my wings. I think I startled him, because he let go and moved away. He was covered in my blood.

I heard shouting. Then someone saying, "Over here!"

I heard three sets of footsteps come around the corner into the road, and I was glad that my wings had already retracted themselves. Yes, I really was that weak.

I saw three blurry figures come closer. The cold man laughed.

"They sent three kids after me?" he chortled. "Three little boys?!"

I opened my eyes to see one boy, the one in the front with white hair, pull out a gun. At least, I thought it was a gun.

"Game's over," he said. I closed my eyes. I heard a loud bang. I knew the man was dead before I opened my eyes, and when I did, all I saw was the three boys. In one glance, I took in that they were all pretty tall, one was blond, one had white hair, and one had dark hair. The white-haired one had shot the man. He was nowhere in sight.

I moaned. I could hear the boys footsteps coming closer.

"Are you okay?" said one. I recognized the voice as the white haired boy.

I opened my mouth to speak, to say I was fine, but all that came out was a weak moan. I clenched my teeth and hissed, "What's happening to me?"

Then the boy swore. He was kneeling beside me.

"What?" asked one of them. I think it was the blond one.

"He bit her," he said angrily.

"Good job, Kiryu," spat the other one.

"Yeah, way to go."

"Well," yelled the one called Kiryu—I opened my eyes to check if he was that one, but it was too blurry to see. I couldn't see his number or his name. "If I had known she had been bitten, I wouldn't have killed that vampire!"

"Do you know what this means, Kiryu?" asked the tall one. "That vampire was a pureblood."

VAMPIRE?!

"Yes," whispered Kiryu. "She will become…"

"One of us."

I gasped, shuddered, and blacked out.

*******

I was out cold most of the way back to…wherever. I remember waking up once, and I was being carried by the white haired boy, Kiryu.

"W—where, are we going?" I asked weakly.

"Somewhere safe."

Now I was lying in a comfy bed, in a room with other beds. It looked kind of like the infirmary at my school. I wondered where I was.

Just then, the whiter haired boy walked in. I could see his name was Zero Kiryu. I was going through one of the spaces of time where everything was unbelievably clear.

"Zero," I managed to gasp. "What are you doing here?"

"How do you know my name?" he asked.

"Not now…" I coughed. My neck was bandaged. It was what made me cough.

"I'm here to check on you…" he said, and then broke off, seeming lost in thought. Then he said, "How do you feel?"

"Unhhhhhhh," I moaned. "I'm hurting…all over…What's happening…everything is going to go blurry in a second, I can feel it…"

"You're becoming a vampire," he said shortly.

"Kiryu," said a warning voice. I looked up, and the dark haired boy (Kaname Kuran) was standing in the doorway. "Don't scare her."

"She has a right to know."

"Zero's right, Kaname."

He looked incredulous. "You're right," he said to Zero. "She does know people's names."

"What happened…I don't remember…?" I said.

"When we brought you in, you told Headmaster Cross 'Mister Cross I don't know what's going on, please help me. These boys have been very nice…' and then you went unconscious again. Then Yuki came to visit you, and you said 'Yuki Cross you are very nice. Can you tell me what is happening?'"

"I…did?"

"Yes," said Kaname.

"Is that…bad?"

"We don't know yet," Kaname continued, but was interrupted by the blond boy, and some others pushing in (Hanabusa Aido was the blond one, and there was also Senri Shiki, Akatsuki Kain, and Takuma Ichijo).

"Hey, she's awake!" said Hanabusa.

"Thank you for helping me, Zero and Kaname and Hanabusa."

"Your welcome," said Kaname. Zero nodded. Hanabusa's jaw dropped.

"She did it again!" said Hanabusa.

I closed my eyes wearily. Everything was starting to blur.

"We should leave," said Kaname. I heard everyone leaving, but I never heard Zero step away.

"Zero?" I asked.

"I'm here," he said.

"Zero, what's going to happen to me? I'm scared. Will I ever be able to go home?"

"I…don't think so. And I know you're scared. I was too."

"You were…human?"

I heard bitterness creep into his voice. "Yes. I was human once, like you. Three months ago. Then I was brought here. You have a long, painful time ahead of you. You might be thankful for being unconscious."

I opened my eyes and looked at him. "I'm sorry, Zero."

"Why?" he looked surprised.

"Because, if I had been paying attention, you wouldn't have had to save me. I wouldn't be like this. And because I know what you went through."

"No, you don't. I have to go. Class starts soon. Good morning. Sleep well."

I was confused. But I was also tired. "Good morning, Zero."

He was already gone.

*******

The next few days—maybe it was hours? Weeks? I couldn't tell—went by painfully slowly. And I mean literally. My neck ached, along with the rest of my body. But my neck hurt most.

Zero and Kaname and Hanabusa and the others came and went. Zero and Yuki usually came during the night because they said that's when they didn't have class. The people in white uniforms always came during the day. Hanabusa and Kaname wore white uniforms.

*******

After a long time of coming in and out of consciousness, I finally woke up. For real. I could see much better than before. I saw my glasses on the table beside the bed. I didn't need them anymore because I could see even better than when I had had them. I could smell, hear, see, and even taste everything better. I could taste something…metallic, almost, in the air. It smelled…good…

The doors burst open, and a man (Toga Yagari) with a strange metal eye patch and flyaway hair rushed in carrying a boy. The boy was bleeding.

"…was out hunting down a level E and found him being mauled by it. Thankfully not a pureblood…"

I sat up. Looking across the room, I saw Toga Yagari put the boy on another bed. I got up and walked over, head full of the scent of…I guess it was his blood.

"Excuse me, Mr. Yagari…"

"What?!"

"Um…what happened?"

"This boy got mauled by a vampire…like you. Don't know his name. What's it to you?"

I looked down at the boy. "His name is Louis Lawliet."

He had panda eyes. He looked like he'd never slept in his whole life. Even now, he was wide awake. His eyes were wide with fear. He hadn't blinked since I'd been looking at him. He shot me a pleading glance.

"Don't worry, Louis Lawliet," I said. "It will be okay."

He nodded once. I walked away, but then Toga Yagari caught my wrist and spun me around. "How do you know peoples' names?"

I cursed. I had forgotten to hide my difference. I was too busy being happy to be alive. "I don't know," I said honestly enough.

He grabbed my jaw and forced my mouth open. I pulled away.

"Congratulations," he said coldly, "You're officially a vampire."

"What?!"

I opened my mouth and ran my finger along my teeth. They were pointed and I accidentally cut my finger. "Ow," I said, and began to lick my finger.

"Don't go around sucking blood. Rule number one—no drinking blood on campus!" barked Toga. "Now be off!"

I began to walk away, and then turned back to Louis Lawliet. "Excuse me, Louis Lawliet…"

"Yes?" he said, speaking for the first time.

"Your blood smells very good," I said, smiling. "Don't worry, I won't bite. Just saying."

He grinned. As I started to walk out of the infirmary, I stopped and called to Toga Yagari, "Where is my…diary? And my eraser?"

"On the table," he pointed. I thanked him, retrieved my Death Note and Death Eraser, and with those as my only two possessions, set out to find Zero.


	3. Vampire

**Kay chapter three, same disc****laimer, I wont keep you waiting…oh but a quick reminder: everyone in these first chapters are like, ages 12-15 ish…anyway, here you go: **

I wondered where I was going to find Zero. I supposed I could look for Kaname Kuran or Hanabusa Aido to show me around, but I trusted Zero most. He and I were in the same boat.

"Hello!" said someone behind me. I knew that someone well.

"Fancy seeing you here, Ryuk."

"I can find you easily enough," he said. "You have my old Deathnote."

"Pssh," I said. "I bet you just asked the other…what did you call them? Oh, Shinigamis…I bet you just asked them."

"Yeah, well…" he hesitated, "yeah, they helped a little, I guess."

I laughed. "It feels good to be among friends."

"So," said Ryuk, "How's life been, since you flew off?"

"Well, let's see," I said, pretending to think, "I found a ghost town, got mauled by a pureblood, got rescued by three boys—well I guess they're about my age, but the cold man called them boys—and became a vampire. Oh, and I was unconscious mostly since then."

"You've been unconscious the whole time?!"

"How long WAS it?" I asked incredulously.

"Three weeks."

I stopped dead in my tracks. "Th—three weeks?! How can that be?! Three…WEEKS?!"

"Yep, three weeks."

"Wow." I kept walking. "I can't believe I was asleep so long…now I feel lazy!"

"Hey, works for Shiki!"

"Hanabusa Aido!" I said, turning. "How are you?"

"Who were you talking to?" he asked, ignoring my question.

"Oh, just…myself. When I was told I'd been asleep so long…I couldn't quite believe it."

"So you…talk to yourself, then," he said. "Interesting."

"Well, there wasn't anyone here to talk TO…" I said, ignoring Ryuk's sarcastic comment: "Because of course, I'm not here."

"See you around, then, Lilith," he said. I had introduced myself over and over in the infirmary, and I'm sure that news of me had floated around. I was sure that everyone knew my name by now. Hanabusa bounced off.

I swore quietly, cursing my stupidity. I was NOT supposed to talk to Ryuk while visible and I was NOT supposed to know everyone's names. I had completely given myself away. Let's hope they weren't all that educated in these…Shinigami matters.

I was walking past a room that must have been the lunch room when I ran into Zero.

"Zero!" I cried happily. "I was looking for you!"

His face was made up into a scowl.

"Zero, what's wrong?" I asked.

"You want to know what's wrong?" Zero asked. "I'll show you."

He grabbed my wrist and pulled me outside. He led me to a small lake and said, "Look into the water. Look at yourself. Look at what's happened to you. Because I didn't get there fast enough."

What I saw shocked me. I had changed—not greatly, just subtle changes. I was beautiful. I wouldn't have known it was me, if I hadn't recognized myself. Only slightly. My hair blew slightly in a wind that wasn't there. It wasn't all tangled. My skin was pale and even—no more freckles. I noticed that I looked good without glasses—and I would never need them again.

"Why is this bad?" I asked Zero.

"Because," he said simply. "You're a vampire. Open your mouth."

I did so, and I was even more shocked than before, even though Toga had told me I had them. Fangs grew where my eyeteeth had been. I supposed they were my new eyeteeth. If I was a vampire, I'd need them.

Ryuk had been quietly following me, but now he spoke. "Nice teeth," he said. "Since you're a vampire now, I guess you'll need them. Henh henh henh henh…"

I looked at Zero. "What happened? How did I become…this?"

"The man that attacked you…was a vampire. He was a pureblood vampire who had gone level E. It's rare for a pureblood to go level E. He…was on the list. Um, there's a list of vampires to hunt. My parents are…were vampire hunters, and since this one was nearby, Teacher Yagari sent me to hunt him down. Aido-senpai and Kaname-sama came along for protection…although apparently you needed it more than me. Why were you there alone anyway?"

"I…ran away."

"Why?"

I found myself explaining everything to this boy I knew a little more than I knew my real father—when he was not under the influence of alcohol. Of course, I left out the Deathnote and Shinigami eyes, and all the Shinigamis and the flying and the invisibility. When I was done, I said, "Please don't tell anyone. I don't want pity or…I don't want them to think lowly of me. Promise?"

He hesitated, mulling over what I'd told him. "Promise."


	4. Answers

**Chapter fourrrrrrrr yeeeeeeeeeeeeeah!!!! Same disclaimer blah blah blah…**

"How's that?" asked the seamstress.

"Uh…" I twisted around. "Much better, thank you."

"That's good. We do need you to be able to breathe after all," she replied, chortling.

"Thanks again," I said.

"You look so pretty!!!" squealed Headmaster Cross.

The Headmaster paid for my uniform and ran out the door. I followed behind, smiling.

Every time he saw a person, he said, "Isn't she so pretty?!!"

"Headmaster Cross, thank you very much for letting me come to school. It was very kind of you to buy my uniform as well."

"Oh, no problem at all," he sang.

The rest of the way back to the school—my new home, I reminded myself—I walked in silence, holding back laughter as Ryuk danced around behind Headmaster Cross, singing, "OOOOOOOOOOOH she's so very pretty!!! Look at herrrrr, don't her eyes sparkle? And the colour of the uniform makes her hair look shiny!!! OH my…"

I chortled once under my breath, and Headmaster Cross said, "Bless you!!!" as if I had sneezed.

When we got back to school, Headmaster had to dance off to his office to do some paperwork for me to attend the school, and I was left wandering again. Of course, in the past week, I had learned my way around school well enough. I wandered my way to the moon dorm and into my room, which I shared with a girl named Rima Toya. She wasn't in the room.

"Well, he's a bit…excited," said Ryuk. "Humans are so interesting. Hee hee hee hee…"

I reached into my little bag (a gift from Headmaster) and pulled out two apples, one of which I tossed to Ryuk. He started shaking it over his head and jumping from foot to foot before eating it. I laughed. His apple dance always made me laugh. I bit into my own apple.

Suddenly Rima came in. "Did you know class starts soon?" she asked. "You better be ready!"

I sighed. I wasn't used to the nocturnal thing yet, but I couldn't sleep at night either. No sleeping during day + no sleeping during night = VERY tired Lilith.

Rima had already gone, having taken my sigh as an okay. But neither I, nor apparently Ryuk, had any intention of me going to class.

"Skip class," he said. "I…uh…have to tell you something…"

"Ryuk," I said with false astonishment, "You're being…_serious_?!?!"

"Yes, I am. Skip class. Come with me, and be invisible."

I did as he said and he flew out the window. I easily kept pace with him.

"Where are we going?" I asked.

"You'll see," he said. Finally, he perched on the roof of the day class people's dorm.

"Why are we here?" I asked. "Ryuk, what's wrong?"

"I wasn't going to tell you…" he said, "But I guess you have a right to know. Your mother had a Deathnote because she…was a Shinigami."

I laughed. "Sure, pull the other leg."

He looked up wearily. My smile faded. "You're…serious."

"I am," he continued. "She fell in love with your father and let him touch her Deathnote so he could see her. Then she had you. That's why you're a bit of a…special case. You're half Shinigami, and now vampire as well. She…left you the Note so you would be able to see her."

"How did she die? Can a God of Death die?!" I asked.

"There is only one way to kill a Shinigami. They must write the name of a human in the Note to save another human's life."

"So…my mother…"

"Wrote the name of a murderer who was about to shoot your father at a supermarket. She therefore extended his life beyond when he was supposed to die. After your mother died, your father turned to alcohol to forget the troubles and…well you know the rest."

I sat wide-eyed for a moment before whispering, "Wow…"

"Anyway…" Ryuk said, more happily, "Whaddaya want to do now? You have all night after all."

"Um…I…want to fly around a bit. Want to come?"

"Sure," he said. We spent the rest of the night racing around in the sky.


	5. Sympathy

**Chapter four disclaim disclaim…I wont waste your time with authors notes :D **

"Zero!" I called, running over. I was just heading to class for the night, and Zero was on Disciplinary duty.

"What does she want with Kiryu?" asked one of the day class boys.

"Hi!" I said, to which he replied, "Hello, Lilith. How are you enjoying school?"

"It's harder than my old school, but I actually think becoming a…night class student…made me smarter."

"It probably did," he said, glaring at some boys who went meekly back to the dorm.

"So, how's life?" I asked.

"Awful. I wish I never had one."

"Don't say that!!!" I said. "Be happy for what you have, don't be sad for what you've lost."

He sighed. "I don't know if I have anything anymore."

"You've got me, if that makes you feel any better," I said, grinning. I ignored Ryuk as he said, "Ew, this is worse than one of those sappy human movies! I'm going to watch wrestling." He flew off.

"Sure. I've got you," he said, and then he actually smiled.

"There you go," I said, beaming. "Frowning takes more muscle than smiling. Plus, frown lines aren't very attractive!"

He sighed again. "But…what I have, no offe4nse, is so little compared to what I've lost."

He looked about on the brink of tears, so I asked, "Do you need a hug?"

He closed his eyes, as if to stop himself from crying. I put my arms around him.

The second I touched him, everything went black.


	6. Vision

**Same crap blah blah blah….**

_I was lying, bleeding on the ground. A beautiful woman stood above me, laughing with a voice that sounded like tinkling bells. _

_"Does it hurt?" she asked. "I know it does. I can see it in your hate-filled eyes."_

_I hated this woman. I loathed her with every fibre of my being. I stared up at her with all the hate and loss in my soul as I lay on the ground, and with each breath, a bit more of my blood pumped out of my body._

_"Your eyes are so beautiful, so full of hate," she said in her musical voice. "To think that those eyes, and the body they're in…it all belongs to me. You belong to me, Zero Kiryu."_

_This woman had killed my family—my mother and father, amazing vampire hunters, and my brother. How I had loved him, and he looked up to me for everything. He would never again apologize for doing less that well in class with Yagari Sensei, and I would never again console him by telling him he had done fine. Never again…_

_"Do you feel it Zero?" the lady asked me. "Do you feel yourself becoming a vampire? It is a long and painful process, little boy. You might want to close your eyes and rest a while…hehehehe…"_

_I caught a final glimpse of her laughing down at me. Then, my vision faded to black._

I awoke, gasping, on the ground. My hand was clenched tightly onto something…Zero's hand. I opened my eyes and found myself face to face with Zero. Looking beyond him, I saw Headmaster, Kaname Kuran, Hanabusa Aido and Akatsuki Kain.

"What…" I croaked weakly, "What happened?"

"Lilith, are you okay?!" asked Zero.

"I…think so," I said. "You didn't answer my question."

"Um…you kind of…just passed out, and you were lying on the ground gasping. I tried to wake you up, but you just grabbed my hand and then you yelled 'no'. What happened to you?"

"I…" I decided not to tell. "I could only see black. I don't remember anything after…after I hugged you."

"Hah!" said Hanabusa. "She's allergic to Kiryu!"

"I'm still holding his hand," I pointed out. Then I realized I was still holding his hand and let go.

"What's going on here," said a voice. Louis Lawliet walked over, slouching and bare-footed.

"Louis Lawliet," I said as Zero helped me up. "I'm glad you are okay."

He looked confused. "My name is Ryuzaki," he said. "I don't know anyone named Louis Lawliet."

"Oh, I'm sorry." I was perplexed. I could see it clearly above his head: _Louis Lawliet, __75231362. _"You…look like someone I know."

"Oh…" he trailed off. "So, what's going on?"

"Um…nothing anymore. I'm okay," I added to Zero, who was standing beside me as if afraid I'd faint again.

"Alright," he said.

"Get back to your dorm," Zero growled.

"I don't attend school here," said 'Ryuzaki'. "I just got out of the infirmary."

"Would you like to stay?" said Headmaster Cross. "We need more brilliant minds like yours around here!!!"

"I…suppose…" Louis/Ryuzaki trailed off.

"He has to stay," said Toga, coming up. "He knows too much."

Hanabusa and Akatsuki had been whispering to each other for some time now, and Toga whiled around to face them. "Do you have something you'd like to let us in on?" he asked. "I don't like being left out on secrets."

"No, Mr. Yagari," said Hanabusa. Akatsuki shook his head.

"Well, off to class then."

The two boys ran off.

Kaname had been standing quietly, but now he spoke up. "Lilith should stay in the moon dorm and rest. Lilith, you are excused from class. Kiryu, please escort her back to the dorm."

"Thank you, president Kaname Kuran. That's very kind of you," I said to the night class president, "But I'm fine. I can go to class."

"No. You need to rest. Now be off, both of you."

I nodded. Zero and I started back to the dorm.

"Zero?"

"Yes?"

I took a deep breath. "I didn't see nothing."

He looked taken aback. "So you didn't just pass out?"

"No. I saw…" I trailed off. The woman had called me Zero Kiryu, which means that…but I couldn't have…could I?

"Yes?"

"I saw…a woman. She was beautiful and she had long, pale hair and she was a vampire, I think. I was…lying on the ground, and I was bleeding. This woman, she was…laughing and taunting me…"

"What did she say," asked Zero. All the colour had drained from his face.

"She said…" I racked my brains. "_Does it hurt? I know it does. I can see it in your hate-filled eyes. Your eyes are so beautiful, so full of hate. To think that those eyes, and the body they're in…it all belongs to me. You belong to me… Zero Kiryu. Do you feel it Zero?Do you feel yourself becoming a vampire? It is a long and painful process, little boy. You might want to close your eyes and rest a while…hehehehe…' _And I know that I hated her…I don't know how, but it seems that the woman had killed my mother and my father and my brother. My parents were vampire hunters. My brother and I had been training to fill their shoes…and she called me Zero."

"That's Shizuka." Zero's eyes were filled with hate, surprise, and grief—something I didn't want to see on the face of someone my age. "And…I don't know how, but you just…stole…one of my…most recent memories. I had been thinking about that when you…hugged me."

That was odd. Could I really have…looked into his memories?!


	7. Good idea?

**Chapter seven (yay seven is my lucky number =] so, anyway enjoy) same disclaimer… oh yeah, I bet you're wondering what ever happened to Seth Loki Yaneko and Aderyn Luna Sumihane, why is this only about Lilith Carmen Hyukamen? Don't worry, everyone else comes in later. =]**** oh yeah, Takehiko is just a random Japanese boy name. It means 'boy'. Genius, I know, huh? Lol, just kidding.**

"WHAT?!" I yelled incredulously. "But he's _human_!!! What if someone decides his blood smells good? Believe me, it does. What if he gets bitten—AGAIN?!"

"Ryuzaki will be fine," Headmaster assured me. "He is simply too intelligent for the day class. He shows a vampire-like thought pattern."

I sighed. Putting a human into the night class wasn't exactly what I would call a brilliant idea, but…

"You can show him the ropes, okay Lilith!!!" said Headmaster happily. "I'm sure the two of you will get along just fine!!!"

He danced off to do whatever business he had elsewhere.

I sighed again and set off to find Louis/Ryuzaki to tell him the news.

"So, a human in a room full of vamps and a Shinigami…" Ryuk trailed off. "Sounds like fun! Henh henh henh henh…"

I kept walking, just in case anyone was watching.

"Hey, if you can turn invisible, maybe you can go through walls!"

I stopped. That could be useful. I fervently looked around the hallway to see if anyone was there. Nope. Okay. I turned invisible and stepped up to the wall.

"You're going to try?" asked Ryuk. "Okay, follow me then. Hee hee hee…"

he stepped through the wall. His head poked back out and said, "See? Nothing to it."

I took a deep breath and stepped toward the wall. I shut my eyes tightly and started walking. And kept walking. Huh?!

I opened my eyes. I was in a day classroom…full of students. Ryuk was laughing next to the wall. I was about to walk into a person—and I doubted I would just go through him.

I turned to Ryuk. "How'd I do?"

"Maybe you'll keep your eyes open next time. It actually looks pretty cool."

Suddenly a thought hit me. "Ryuk?"

"Yeah?"

"Um…since I can turn invisible…you know how a Shinigami can only be seen by a human if he or she has touched the Shinigami's Deathnote, right? So…if a human toughed MY Deathnote…would he or she be able to see me when I'm invisible?"

"Well, no one's ever been quite like you before…I've heard of people who were born with the eyes of a Shinigami, but never someone who could turn invisible…so, technically…maybe."

"Thanks, that helps." I touched my bag, which I kept my Note in and brought everywhere. I supposed I could make someone touch my Note and then walk up to them, invisible, and see if they see me…

"Alright, let's go," I said, and walked back through the wall. Despite what Ryuk had said, I closed my eyes again, but didn't walk so far this time. I came out in the middle of an empty hall.

Suddenly, the bell rang for the next class. I knew that in about two seconds the hall would be flooded. I couldn't stand there invisible, or people would be curious about the invisible thing they were running into, but if I became visible, I would get swarmed for being a night class person…and probably in trouble with Zero. Oh well.

I became visible a millisecond before everyone came out of class.

"Hey, look over there!!"

"That's Lilith, the new night class girl!"

"She's so pretty!"

"I'm dating her in secret!"

"Dream on, Takehiko!"

"Oh no," I said under my breath as people started swarming me.

"Hey," barked a very familiar voice. I had never been so happy to hear that voice in the whole month and a half that I'd known it.

"Move along," said Zero. "Lilith, what the hell do you think you're doing?!"

"Um, looking for L—um, Ryuzaki," I said. "Headmaster's orders."

"Ryuzaki here," said Louis/Ryuzaki coming up from behind me.

"Alright," said Zero in his I'm-taking-charge-so-shut-up-and-listen voice. "Everyone but Ryuzaki, Lilith and I are gone by the time I count to three. One."

Everyone was already leaving under Zero's intimidating glare.

"Two."

He didn't even have to say three.

"Ryuzaki," I said, "Headmaster wants you in the night class."

"What?!" said Zero. "But that's—"

"Insane, I know. I tried to tell Headmaster Cross, but…"

"What's wrong with the night class?" asked Louis/Ryuzaki. I wondered, not for the first time, why he was using a fake name.

"Um…nothing." I couldn't tell him. I was told not to tell any of the day class people about the night class' secret. But Louis wasn't a day class boy anymore…

"Move along, Ryuzaki," said Zero.

"See you later, Lilith," he said, walking away. "Bye, Mr. Disciplinary man."

I snickered. Zero shot me a half-hearted glare.

"I better go too, Mr. Disciplinary man," I said, laughing. "See you."

"Bye, Lilith."

I wondered again if it was a good idea to put Louis in the night class. Only time would tell.


	8. Prove it, L

**Chapter eight…hee hee I like this story. Its almost writing itself. It just lends itself to so many brainstorms. I already know how it'll end. SPOILER: it's tragic. MWA HA HA!!!! Anyway same disclaimer.**

"I don't understand why the Headmaster wanted us to start attending so close to summer break," said Louis/Ryuzaki. We were walking to class.

"I don't know," I said, "But it isn't like we can just go home and pretend nothing happened. I'm a vampire and you got mauled by one. That changes a person, you know?"

He chuckled. "I guess you're right. But I can't help but suspect that there's some other reason we're here…"

"How sure are you?"

"About 3%."

I laughed. He looked at me seriously. "Well, I'm usually right. Laugh if you want, but you won't be laughing when you find out I was right."

"Okay. Say, you really do look like my friend, Louis. Have you met him?" I pressed.

"Um…can you keep a secret?"

"Sure," I said.

"Okay." He took my hand and pulled me away from the other vamps.

"My name isn't Ryuzaki."

"I know that," I pointed out. "Freak of nature, remember? Don't tell anyone though. The only people I'm being honest about it with are you and Zero."

"No problem," he said. "It only makes sense that in order to have some motivation to not tell my secret, I should have a secret of yours. Anyway, my name is Louis Lawliet. I am L, the famou—"

"L?! You expect me to believe that you're L?! The famous detective?!"

"I am."

"Prove it," I said.

"How?"

"I'll think of something. I'll plan out a case, a series of puzzles and clues and hidden messages. If you can solve it, I'll believe you. Not that I don't trust you, just…"

"I suppose you wouldn't expect someone like me to be L," he said.

"Not…really," I confessed. "I thought that for sure L would be an old, wise man. Surely not someone of my own age."

"I guess. We should get to class."

"Yeah, I guess…"

Class was interesting. We had advanced math, among other classes, and Ryuzaki—I kept thinking of him as Ryuzaki because if he wanted me to call him that, I didn't want to slip up—kept answering the questions. Hanabusa was very surprised and showed it. Everyone else was confused but did a better job of concealing it.

At the end of class, I was telling Ryuzaki that he really should have looked at Hanabusa when he answered that last question, when Zero came up to us.

"Hiya Zero!" I said happily. Then my eyes widened. "I have an idea! Zero, Lou—um, Ryuzaki can help us with my…problem! Plus, I can use that to test him! Might not be as upscale as I wanted it to be, but I doubt he'll get it…"

Ryuzaki looked at me, perplexed. "Am I in trouble?"

I shook my head and took his hand. "Come on, Zero!"

Zero had an expression on his face that I couldn't quite classify. He followed me anyway.

I went to the foyer of the moon dorm.

"Okay, Ryuzaki," I said, "When I passed out the other day—remember?—I actually looked into Zero's memory. Plus, I can see people's names…and…"

Could I tell them?

"What is it, Lilith?" Zero asked quietly.

"I can…do this." I looked around. Everyone had gone back to their rooms—we were stragglers. I threw out my wings.

Both of the boys' jaws dropped.

"That shouldn't be possible," said Ryuzaki.

"Are those real?" asked Zero.

"You have the evidence before you. And, if they were fake, could I do this?"

I flew to the ceiling and back down.

"Okay. So you exist and have wings."

"And…I can…" I disappeared.

"Lilith?!" said the boys in unison.

They couldn't hear me, so I didn't bother saying anything. I walked up behind them and reappeared. I stepped between them and said, "Boo."

"How did you do that?" asked Zero.

"I'll tell you later, even though I'm not sure myself. Ryuzaki has to figure it out. Oh, while I'm at it…can you do me a favour?"

"I don't see why not," said Ryuzaki, and Zero nodded. I reached into my bag and pulled out my Deathnote.

"Are you sure that's a good idea?" asked Ryuk. I pulled out an apple and tossed it to him.

"Yum!" he caught the apple and did the apple dance. He began eating the apple.

"Is that apple disappearing into thin air?" asked Ryuzaki.

"No, my reaper is eating it," I said, perfectly seriously.

"_Your_ reaper?!" asked Ryuk.

I nodded.

"Anyway," I said, "Touch this, both of you." I held out the Note.

They did as I said.

"Okay…" I put it back in my bag. "Now watch." I turned invisible. They continued to watch me expectantly.

"You can see me?" I asked.

"Yes," said Zero.

"I'm invisible to anyone but you, and only you can hear me. Oooh, watch this!"

I paraded through the wall to outside, then back in.

"Pretty cool, huh?!"

"I'll need a while for this one," confessed Ryuzaki.

"I wonder why," asked Zero sarcastically. "I have to go. Class is starting soon. You two better get to bed."

"Nah," said Ryuzaki. "I think I'll hit the kitchen. I hear Cross Academy makes great cake."


	9. Deduction and Observation

**Chapter nine…same disclaim whatever cheese (hee hee I love cheese :) ) next chapter =]**

"Hmm…" said Ryuzaki. "Can I have a bit more information on your reaper? Or, that is, reapers in general?"

"I'll tell you what I know, but it isn't much."

We were sitting under a tree after class. Ryuzaki had been yelled at by the teacher for not sitting properly. Apparently they hadn't minded yesterday because he had just started.

"Okay…" I decided to start at the beginning. "His name is Ryuk. He's one of a race called 'Shinigamis'. He can see a person's name and a number that tells that person's life span. So he basically knows when you were born and when you'll die. Um, he can't tell you though. Ummmmm, he's invisible until you touch his Deathnote…that's about it."

"Okay."

"Hey, Ryuk! I just thought of something!"

"Yeeeeeeees?" he looked up from inspecting his fingernails.

"You said that I had my mother's Deathnote, but you also said it was your old one. How does that work?!"

"She stole mine when she lost one of hers. That's how I knew her, and that's why I was interested when she fell in love with a mortal."

"I didn't even know her name," I said sadly.

"It was Rida," he said.

"Rida…" I breathed.

"So you can hear this Shinigami," Ryuzaki said. "To me it looks like you're having a conversation with a very tall bit of air."

"Yes."

"That's simple then. Your mother was a Shinigami and she passed some of her talents to you."

"How'd you know?!"

"You said something about her Deathnote, which I assume is the notebook you made me touch that allowed me to see you when invisible. Simple."

"Oops…okay fine. You're L—IF you can help me solve the vision problem.."

"Okay. I'll work on it, but you better get to bed. You'll be tired tomorrow night."

"What about you? Don't you sleep?"

"Nope. I think I'll head back to the kitchen. They really do make good cake."

"Morning, L."

"See you."

I got up and headed to the moon dorm. I noticed that the day class was out for PE and turned invisible. I was curious if Zero was there.

He was. I headed over. He was facing away from me so I went up behind him and said, "Ssshhhhhhhhhh, I'm invisible. Just dropping by to say hello."

"And what," he said under his breath, "Why are you here?"

"I was with Ryuzaki. He figured it out. My mother was a Shinigami."

"You mean a reaper?" His face wore an almost sour expression.

"Yeah. I better get to bed. See you around, Disciplinary man."

He grinned, and Yuki asked, "Zero, why are you grinning?"

"I…just remembered something…funny. An inside joke." Then he added, under his breath, "Bye, Lilith."

I continued to the dorm. When I was sure no one was looking, I turned visible and continued on.

*******

"Yes, I'm sure, Akatsuki! Would I lie to you?!" said Hanabusa Aido.

"Yes, you would, Hanabusa," said Akatsuki Kain. "I'm sure Lilith couldn't have appeared from thin air. Go back to bed, you probably dreamed it."

"Okay, Akatsuki. Good morning."

"'Morning."


	10. Secret

**Hello, I'm back :) I'm happy that this story is getting such good reviews : )))))) anyway, I don't suggest you get attached to any of the characters, just in case I decide to kill them MWA HA HA H****AAAAAAA!!! Kay same disclaimer… ummm….SPOILER: the ending is seriously tragic. Like, Romeo and Juliet mixed with Hamlet plus Vampire Knight and Death Note…mwa ha ha ha ha ha….**

**Also, I'll change the dates of some occurrences, so please don't kill me. I'll set the vamps on you!**** BWAHAHAHAHA…and anywho, its MY story, so yeah…**

**Oh by the way, I probably won't put too much classes in here…I'll just say they went to class and it was very interesting, because a) I don't know what questions they'd ask those superior minds, and b) let alone the answers!**

I let my feet dangle off the branch. I was sitting high in a tree, looking out over campus. I hadn't been able to sleep.

Suddenly, I spied Ryuzaki. He was crouching—well, sitting, in his strange way—eating some doughnuts and thinking. I could tell by the expression on his face. In between doughnuts, he would chew his index fingernail.

I dropped out of my tree—almost four stories I dropped. I landed in a crouch and was running before I had straightened up.

I went and sprawled on the grass next to him, but he was so deep in thought he didn't notice. I snapped in front of his face. He blinked, surprised.

"Hey, Louis," I said, since no one was around, and I figured I'd taunt him (haha, I know your name!).

"Hi, Lilith. What's new?" he asked, unfazed.

"Nothing, really," I said, "I was just sitting in a tree since class. You?"

"Well...I think I may have come up with a possibility for your affliction."

"Wow, you used a whole sentence that I understood," I said, laughing a little. "What's your idea?"

"We need to find Kiryu…I'm going to run some experiments," he said.

"O…kay," I replied, a little weirded out. "Leave that to me. I'll go bust him out of class."

"Meet at the moon dorm when you've found him," said Louis, and got up and slouched away.

I turned invisible and set out to locate Zero. This was made much easier by my ability to walk through walls. I walked through class after class, and when I finally found him, I stopped to say, "Hi. I'm busting you out. Be right back."

I stepped out of the classroom and became visible. I knocked on the door.

"Come in," said the teacher.

I stepped into the room. Everyone gasped and started muttering.

"I need to borrow…Zero Kiryu," I said clearly over the rabble. I had paused so that some of them could hope I needed _them_.

"Kiryu, you're excused."

"Thank you, Sensei," said Zero, then gathered his things and ducked out of the class with me.

"What's up?" he asked.

"Ryuzaki thinks he knows why I have all these weird…powers or whatever they are."

Ryuk glided up. "Hiya. So the little human thinks he knows, eh? Henh henh henh…"

"Yes, and I think he does," I said, and when I saw Zero's perplexed expression, I said, "Reaper."

"Oh…" said Zero. "Where are we going?"

"Moon dorm."

"Okay."

We walked the rest of the way in silence. Not an awkward silence, just…we had nothing to say.

I noticed that Zero was being very careful not to touch me at all.

When we finally got to the dorm, Ryuzaki was waiting, sitting on the stairs. He stood when we came in.

"Hi, Kiryu-san," he said, "And Lilith."

"Ryuzaki," Zero said shortly.

"Hiya Ryuzaki," I said happily. "So, can you tell us now?"

"Well," he said, "When you hugged Kiryu, you got the vision, correct?"

"Yeah?"

"Well, I believe that what you saw had been on his mind at the time, and it must be a very strong memory for him. When you touched him, the memory passed on to you. I assume this never happened before, so it must be that you talent for seeing people's lifespan and name increased to also being able to see memories they are thinking of at the time."

"Well, I don't know if that was what I was thinking of, at the time," said Zero, "So it might not be that…"

"Which is why I am going to test it," said Ryuzaki patiently.

"How?" I asked.

"I will remember something and then you touch me," he replied. "Simple."

"Okay…" I said, wondering what his past could have been like.

"Hmm, what to remember…" he muttered, no longer talking to Zero and me. I chanced a look at Zero and found him looking at me, concerned. He looked down when he noticed me observing him.

"It'll be fine," I whispered soothingly.

"You'd better be right," he growled.

"Okay, I know what to remember," he said. "Here, Lilith."

He held out his hand.

Holding my breath, I took it.

_"Don't worry, Louis," said the old man. He looked like a combination of a butler and a kindly grandfather. "My name is Quillish Wammy. I had this orphanage built for children like you, who have no parents."_

_I was standing, hunched over with the loss of my parents, chewing my fingernail. I was only five and a half years old._

_"You show great promise," he told me. "One day, you will assume the title of L. Once, I held this title. But now, I am too old. Now, go on in and make yourself at home."_

_I walked into the big house. I didn't think the place would ever feel like home. Not without my parents…_

"Oh, Louis," I breathed, coming back to reality. "That's horrible. I had no idea…"

I was curled on the floor in a fetal position, clinging to Ryuzaki's hand.

"I mean, uh, Ryuzaki," I said, hastily letting go.

"So you saw it?" he probed.

"Yup, I sure did. Quillish Wammy, huh? Isn't he like, that famous inventor?"

"Yes, he is," replied Ryuzaki.

"You missed it," said Zero, "When you fell on the groung, you dragged Ryuzaki with you. He did a face plant."

"Are you okay?" I asked, concerned.

"Fine," he assured me. Zero stalked off.

"I better get back to class," he said. I couldn't quite place the expression on his face. A mixture between anger and sadness and longing.

"Bye, Zero," I called.

He didn't answer.

Louis stood and offered me his hand. I took it and he helped me get up.

"So that's why you're always slouching," I mused. "I always wondered."

"I carry the weight of my parents' deaths on my shoulders. After that I swore to stop all killers. That I why I am so motivated to be L."

"That's great. I mean that you have motivation," I amended hastily. "Okay, I believe you. You're L."

"I thought that might convince you," he said.

"But still," I said, "you should have better posture."

I took a few steps toward him. He didn't move. I put my hands on his shoulders and pushed him against a wall. I pushed from his shoulders to straighten his spine.

"Wow!" I said. "You're as tall as Zero! You're so _tall_!"

"Is that a compliment?"

"Yes!!!!"

"Then thanks."

I was still standing with my hands on his shoulders, looking up at his face. He was looking down at me. We really were quite close…

_I was being carried by a strange man. I look up and I see that he has a metal patch over one eye and long flyaway hair. I didn't understand any of what he was saying except the word 'mauled' and my brain was all fuzzy. And what was this 'level E' he was talking about?_

_I am bleeding all over. They put me in a hospital cot. They tell me not to be afraid. I hear the man who had been carrying me. He is talking to a girl. She has a beautiful voice._

_"This boy got mauled by a vampire," the man was saying. "Don't know his name. What's it to you?"_

_The girl looked at me. She really was very pretty. She had long brown hair and pale skin. Her eyes were deep brown. Her look was full of compassion. It was the look of a person who I would want to know. A look I fell in love with immediately._

_"His name is Louis Lawliet," she said. My eyes widened. She knew my real name. I shot her a pleading glance. She misinterpreted it, and said, "Don't worry, Louis Lawliet. It'll be okay."_

_I nodded once. She and the man continued talking. I caught the word "vampire" from him. She exclaimed, "What?!"_

_I looked up to see her running a finger along her teeth. She cut herself on one of her eyeteeth and began licking her finger. The man told her not to drink blood on campus. She was about to leave, then she turned back to me._

_"Excuse me, Louis Lawliet…" she said, trailing off._

_"Yes?" I encouraged her._

_"Your blood smells very good," she said in a rush. She smiled, and went on in a more relaxed voice. "I won't bite. Just saying."_

_She asked the man a question, and left. I hoped I would see her again._

I awoke, somehow miraculously not on the floor. I was sitting against a wall, leaning on Louis's shoulder. As soon as I realized that, I sat bolt upright, remembering my vision.

"I…uh…uh…" I stuttered. "Louis, I…"

"I…should go…" he said quickly, and ducked out of the room. Not before I saw the colour tinting his normally pale cheeks.

I was left alone in the room.

"I guess I wasn't supposed to see that…" I trailed off. But I was glad I had. Smiling, I headed off for bed.


	11. A Letter From Home

**Heyyyyyyyyyyyy fans (: so, heres your chapter, same disclaimer…you know the speech…**

The next day, I couldn't sleep.

I had gone to class that night, as usual. The only different thing was that Louis didn't walk to class with me. He didn't look at me once.

Zero did, but he noticed that I was distant and thinking of something else, so he didn't speak. Still, he was a comforting presence. He seemed to know I would talk when I was ready.

I threw off the sheets. I had a room to myself, since Rima Toya got moved out. I figured she thought I was weird, but she didn't show it. Maybe I dreamed it and she just moved because there was an opening. Either way, I had my own room. So did Ryuzaki, I was told, but I didn't know what room was his. Still, I had to know.

I dressed quickly and headed out of the room. I saw Hanabusa Aido heading down the hallway. Had he been up late?

"Hanabusa Aido!" I said. "Why are you up so early?"

"Oh, I, uh…I could ask the same of you," he said.

"Touché," I replied. "So, can you tell me which room belongs to Ryuzaki?"

"It's…that one," he said, pointing to a door in the hallway.

"Thank you. Good morning," I said cheerily.

"'Morning," he said, yawning. He headed into the room he and Akatsuki Kain shared.

I went up to Ryuzaki's door. It was slightly ajar. I knocked lightly. No answer. I peeked my head around the door.

I saw a bright square; a computer screen, a realized. Louis himself was slumped over the desk.

He was sleeping.

Aha! I thought. So you _do_ sleep!

I walked over. I would wake him so he could go to bed. He would hurt his neck and back, slumped over his knees like that. It was ridiculous, how he always sat like that. Of course, apparently it made him smarter, but if I was falling asleep, I would move. To each his own, I supposed.

I put my hand on his shoulder, to wake him.

_Lilith, walking towards me. I don't move. What is she going to do? She puts her hands on my shoulders. I am confused. I want to know so badly is she likes me. I wonder. I have never had a real friend my age. And Wammy was always busy. He hadn't been much fun._

_Lilith pushes me back. I back right into a wall. She straightens my back against the wall. I remember when I first saw her. She was so beautiful._

_Suddenly her face takes on a blank look. Her jaw goes slack. I think she in unconscious. She slumps to the floor. I sit next to her. I do not want her to fall on the floor again. She leans against me, and I try to stem the surge of pleasure._

_Suddenly, I realize what she must be seeing. My first memory of her. It had been what I was thinking of. It was a strong memory._

_Her eyes closed, and she sighed. I knew she'd wake up soon. I wondered if I was happier that she knew how I felt or scared that she wouldn't feel the same._

Black.

_I am walking to class. Lilith is beside me, talking, laughing. Her face is so beautiful when she smiles. She lights up the night. She is a great friend. My very first friend._

Finally, I managed to break from my trance. I was standing, miraculously, but I was dangerously off balance. Black spots danced before my eyes, like when you stand up too fast. My hand was clenched around Louis's shirt.

I let go and sat on the corner of the bed. Louis muttered my name. I smiled.

I stood slowly, testing my balance. I seemed fine. I pulled the covers back on the bed. I rolled Louis's chair, thanking God that it had wheels, to the side of the bed. I managed to get him off the chair and into bed without waking him. I covered him with the blanket.

"Goodnight Louis," I whispered. I turned off the screen of the computer so the light wouldn't wake him. I left, closing the door softly behind me.

I smiled again. I was reminding myself of a mother. Not that I ever had one…I remembered, at school, mothers fussing over their children before they left. I padded back to my room. I had a feeling I'd be able to sleep now.

As I was locating my pyjamas (I had thrown them to random points of the room in my hurry to find Louis) I had a sickening thought.

What would happen to my father?

I had paid the rent, so where would he live? I found out the reason he was alcoholic was because my mother had died. Did he love me enough to mourn my disappearance? He hadn't been sad in front of me when he had killed my younger sister in a drunken rage…

I didn't bother changing. Instead, I left the moon dorm.

The sunlight outside was blinding. I headed for the main building. I was looking for the headmaster.

When I finally found him, in his office, he was sorting papers of some kind.

"Headmaster?" I said timidly.

"Lilith!" he exclaimed. "Nice to see you! How's school?"

"Great…uh," I didn't quite know how to ask. "Do you have any news of my father?"

"No, I don't…" he said. "would you like me to find some?"

"Yes, please," I said, somewhat desperately.

"One second," he sang.

He typed something in on the computer. He was probably searching recent newspapers in my town. If anything had happened, it would be in the news. Otherwise, he'd be the same.

"Oh…" a frown creased his forehead.

"What?" I asked. In answer, he turned the monitor to face me. I read the article.

_**51 Year Old Man Dead**_

_Hasami Hyukamen, aged 51 years, proclaimed dead. Was charged for drunk driving. Hyukamen claimed to be searching for his missing daughter, Lilith (cover image) who has been missing for some time. Ironically, on the way to his trial, the man died in a drunk driving accident, nearly killing the other man._

_Hyukamen, it was later discovered, was the father of two children. His wife died when his oldest daughter was a year old. It was discovered that Hyukamen was responsible for the murder of his five-year-old daughter, a year younger than Lilith. Apparently, Mrs. Hyukamen died in childbirth._

_If anyone has the whereabouts of Lilith or has seen her, please contact us at (123) 456-7890 or at our website, ._

"He's…dead?" I whispered.

"I'm sorry, Lilith," said Headmaster Cross. "I truly am."

"Th—thanks," I said shakily.

"You should get some sleep," he said gently, for once not buoyant.

"Yes, Headmaster," I said quietly. "Good morning."

"Sleep well," he replied.

I closed the door softly behind me. I didn't know if I would get _any_ sleep now.


	12. Four Years Later

**FOUR YEARS LATER by the way…same disclaimer.**

I was walking back from class alone, as I had for a long time. I figured I may as well get used to it, because I doubted that Louis would want to talk to me after the memory I wasn't supposed to see. He had been avoiding me for four years. I talked to Zero all the time in between classes, but that didn't allow for much.

Class had been unremarkable. The teacher had gotten annoyed when I wasn't paying attention. I was looking at Louis most of class, wondering if he would look at me. He did, once, but when he realized I was looking, he looked away.

It was all so sudden.

The smell of blood was in the air. I knew that blood. I would know it anywhere.

Hanabusa Aido wasn't anywhere in sight.

I sprinted in the direction of the smell. I recognised the smell although it had been years ago since I'd smelled it—it belonged to Louis Lawliet.

I heard voices, so I slowed. I wondered if it was Headmaster or someone come to help. I peeked around a corner.

Louis was standing, cornered. His books were on the ground. I could see a rivulet of warm blood running down his finger; a paper cut. I assumed he had dropped his books and when he picked them up had accidentally cut himself.

That wasn't the interesting part, however. The part that scared me was that Akatsuki Kain and Hanabusa Aido were cornering him.

"May I drink some of your blood, please?" Hanabusa was saying. "It smells so good—like candy, almost. Like sugar."

"Don't bother asking when you know the answer, Hanabusa," drawled Akatsuki. "We'll make this quick, so no one sees."

I saw his move a second before he made it.

I launched myself at him just as he pounced at Louis.

I landed on top of him, but as we hit the ground it knocked the breath out of me. I seemed to have knocked sense into Akatsuki, but Hanabusa was still hunting Louis. I had to stop him, but I couldn't breathe. I suddenly remembered a time not so long ago, when I had lost my breath from a vampire knocking into _me_.

I gasped for a second, until I got enough air to whisper, "Sorry," to Akatsuki. Then I shoved myself up and immediately regretted it. Black spots swam before my eyes. I had stood too quickly.

I didn't have enough air. I was about to pass out. I could tell. I had fainted a few times before. It was just like this. My vision faded to a small circle, and finally to black.

"Hanabusa," I rasped weakly, feeling dizzier with the air it took to say it. "No…"

And I felt my head hit the ground.

*******

I sat bolt upright.

"Louis!" I screamed.

"Shhhhh," someone whispered, gently pushing me down. "You'll make yourself dizzy."

"Z—Zero?" I whispered feebly.

"Yes?" he replied anxiously. "Are you okay?"

"I…I'm fine," I replied. "I think…where's L—uhm, Ryuzaki?"

"I don't know if you've noticed…you keep calling Ryuzaki, Louis. Because _I've_ noticed. Is something up?"

"Uh…" I thought fast, not easily, since I was still a little slow. "Uh….okay you got me…he, uh, looks like this…friend I used to know…"

"And?" he inquired, politely, but it was clear he could see right through my lie. Zero was cool like that. If he knew I didn't want to tell something, at least not yet, he wouldn't pester. I guess because he would understand secrets.

"Uh, he…moved away. Haven't seen him since." My story fell flat. Zero seemed to know whether I was lying or not, even though no one else would ever know. I was a good liar; I had to be—my old town wasn't exactly the land of sunshine and rainbows and butterflies.

"I see…" he muttered.

"So, where's Ryuzaki? How'd you get here? What…happened?" I fired the questions in a rapid succession.

"Well," he started, "I heard…fighting, so I came to check it out. And the smell…I can see why they wanted his blood. I found you passed out, Kain on the ground, and Aido on top of Ryuzaki."

I gasped. Zero went on, ignoring my horror.

"I…broke up the fight—"

"You nearly threw me through a wall!" yelled Hanabusa. I turned, noticing I was in the infirmary. So was he.

"Anyway, so then Kain went with him to the moon dorm, and I carried you here. Yagari Sensei went back for Ryuzaki."

"Is he…okay?" I asked, worried. He shouldn't be dead, he still had a while, by his numbers…had his paper cut changed that?

Just then, Toga Yagari burst through the doors. In his arms was Louis. I was overwhelmed by a sense of Déjà vu.

"Ryuzaki!" I yelled. Zero frowned. His expression was…almost anger, mixed with a portion of longing and a healthy serving of despair.

"Zero?" I asked quietly. "Are you okay?"

"Fine," he muttered. "I have class to get to." He got up too fast and speed-walked from the room.

I sat up slowly, swinging my legs off the bed. I stood even more slowly. Once I was sure that I wouldn't pass out again, I rushed to Louis' side.

He was unconscious.

Were we too late?

Toga Yagari left, saying, "None of my business anymore…"

I was alone with Louis.

"Louis," I said, close to tears. He was all bloody. It smelled good, but I was in no danger. I valued him so far above his blood that it didn't bother me anymore.

"Louis, can you hear me?" I whispered tearfully. He didn't move.

His numbers told me he was still alive, but for the moment, he didn't look it. Could the numbers lie? His breathing was so shallow and ragged…

"Please, Louis…don't die," I begged. "Please…"

He sighed. I took that as an 'okay'.

"I can't stand the thought of you dying," I whispered. "You can't leave me. You're staying with me. I won't let you go!" my voice rose with the emotion.

His eyelids fluttered, but remained closed. His breathing stayed the same. Still unconscious, but waking.

"Louis…I…I don't care if you…like me or anything. That definitely doesn't mean I won't want to talk to you. I can't…I…if you died…I couldn't…"

Hearing someone talk to him seemed to be helping. His breathing sped a little, but he still seemed out.

"Please, Louis," I begged, clasping his hand. I tried hard not to accept any visions. I figured maybe, just maybe I could learn to control my little talent. "Please…"

"Unh," he grunted, eyes opening. "What the…"

"Louis!" I yelled happily, hugging him as he pushed himself up on one elbow. "You're okay! I mean, I knew you wouldn't die, but it's not always so easy to trust the numbers…"

"I…you talk a lot," he said, blinking. "Uh, I…I think I was comatose. At least, I couldn't move, but I could…could hear…"

"Oh…" I blushed. "I…really mean it, you know. You can love me, hate me…whatever…I'll still want to talk to you. Nothing will ever change that."

"I…" he trailed off. "I wasn't worried as much about you…as my own cowardice. I couldn't face telling you, but you found out anyway…then…I was afraid of what you'd think. But my fear was clearly for nothing. Your heart is pure as gold."

I blushed deeper. "I couldn't imagine hating you…or even…not liking you, Louis. I…I…I love you too, Louis."

He looked at me incredulously. "You do? But…I'm…I mean…"

"I…should go…get some rest…you too, you know. Class, and everything…although I'm not sure you should go, in your state…"

"I'll be fine…" he said awkwardly, yet clearly still happy. "Morning, Lilith."

"Morning…Ryuzaki," I grinned. Then I turned and sauntered to the door. I threw the door wide, a smile wide on my face.

"Zero!" I said, surprised and happy to see him. But my smile quickly faded at the expression on his face. He covered it up in a second, but for that second, the expression I'd seen on his face had been clearly…pain. I let the door swing gently shut behind me as I took a little half step toward him.

"Zero, what's wrong?" I asked worriedly, urgently.

"Nothing," he said, but his voice clearly showed the pain. He couldn't hide it.

"I know you, Zero. Tell me what's wrong!"

"Why would you care?" he said in a dead, broken voice. It scared me more than if I had yelled. "Just…just go. Leave. NOW!" he screamed the last word, but instead of waiting for a response, fled in the opposite direction of his classes.

I walked brokenly back to my room. I wondered where Ryuk was when you needed him, stupid reaper. I hadn't seen him in ages, but it would be nice to have someone try to cheer you up now and then, like he always had when I was upset. But who can trust a reaper? Who can trust _anyone_?


	13. Temper

**Same disclaimer…sorry for jumping like that to the present, but it was necessary, since nothing really happened…anything important will be explained, so no fear. Enjoy:**

I awoke suddenly. It wasn't quite dark yet, but I doubted I would be able to sleep again. My dreams—or more, nightmares—had been haunted. By Zero, the expression of hurt and betrayal etched onto his face…Louis, looking dead in the arms of Toga Yagari…Headmaster Kaien Cross on that day, four years ago, showing me the proof that the last member of my family was dead. I shuddered.

I got up and dressed quickly, and proceeded through my morning routine. After it all, I sat brushing my hair, stroke by stroke, as if I could brush off my dream the same way.

"Oh!" I whispered. I had almost forgotten. We were getting some new students today…chosen for giftedness. Most would go into the night class, like Louis had. Louis. I smiled. I didn't know when I had started to like him…I had just realized at that very moment this morning that I did…I loved him.

I hurried out, thinking I would see Zero on Disciplinary duty.

When I got to the paved walkway between classes, I noticed, with a sinking heart, that Zero wasn't there. It was only Yuki, being nearly run over by the day class people, leaving class.

I walked up beside her. "HEY!" I yelled. Everyone stopped dead, jaws dropping all around.

"I want you to all walk back to your dorm…NOW!" I tried to imitate Zero's I'm-taking-over-so-shut-up-and-listen voice, but I didn't get it. Still, everyone…sort of listened.

"Thanks," Yuki said gratefully.

"Don't mench," I replied.

Some boys were discreetly walking closer to me. "Hey!" I screamed at them. "GO HOME!"

I scared everyone off.

Yuki giggled. "You can be as scary as Zero-san, sometimes, you know, Lilith?"

"Uh…Thanks, Yuki…" I had stopped calling people by their full names—to help hide my difference. "See you later, I guess."

"Bye!"

I walked sullenly to class. Where could Zero be?

Class went by in a whirlwind…I didn't notice much. I was worried. Zero was depressed enough. The pain I had seen on his face… I barely noticed when Louis fell into step beside me.

"Lilith?" he asked tentatively. I snapped to attention at his voice.

"Louis!" I beamed. "Sorry…I was…"

"Worrying." It hadn't been a question.

"How'd you know?" I asked helplessly.

"You get this little crease between your eyebrows," he said.

"Only you would notice that," I chuckled.

"I don't know," he replied. "You're pretty observative…"

"Thanks!"

"L!" someone yelled. "Hey, L!"

I turned to see someone about twelve or thirteen, with white hair like Zero's, only curly. He was walking toward us, waving.

"L," he said when he caught up. "Nice to see ya!"

"Near," Louis greeted him. "You too. This is Lilith. Lilith, this is Near."

I looked at 'Near'. Nate Rivers. Okay. "Hi, Near."

"I'm in the night class, too," Nate informed me. "They say I'm gifted."

"Cool," I said. "So's L." I wondered how this boy knew L.

"Not surprised…but it's not easy to change sleeping habits," he said ruefully. "I envy you vampires!" He had been informed, along with other night class students, that most of us were vamps.

Someone scoffed. "Near?" said a boy with a blond bob, munching a chocolate bar. "Surprised you're here. I would have thought they're put you with the day people.

"Mello," Near said, somewhat stiffly.

"Mello," said Louis.

"L," replied Mello.

"Lilith!" I said. Everyone looked at me. "Nice to meet you both," I muttered.

"Mello!" said someone else.

"Hey, Matt!" said Mello. Someone sauntered up. a boy about the same age as Mello, with reddish hair and…goggles? Okay then…to each his own…

"So that's Lilith, huh?" said Matt. "Well, Lilith…It's my pleasure to meet you. I'm Matt."

"Nice to meet you too," I replied evenly. I was used to boys acting like this by now.

"So, bedtime, kids," said Akatsuki, coming up behind me. I whipped around and hissed.

"Get out of here, Kain," I hissed between my teeth.

"And if I don't?"

"Leave," I said in a flat voice. I was past games. Past my breaking point. A growl escaped my lips as reinforcement.

"Make me," he replied, almost teasing, but I could hear the challenge in his voice.

"Fine," I growled, launching myself at him. "Maybe—I—will!"

I hurtled into him, knocking him to the ground. He did a back somersault so he was on top of me. I wormed my legs under him and kicked him over my head. I got up quickly, while he was still recovering. By the time I had got to him—I had kicked him pretty far—he was half on his feet. I shot a well-aimed punch at his face. His nose cracked as my fist connected. I knew, since he was a vampire, that it would fix itself quickly, but I knew as well that he felt pain.

"Never—" I growled, "Lay—a—hand—on—my—friends—again." I punctuated each word with a swipe of my hands, leaving gashes all across his chest.

He had done nothing to fight back until now, perhaps because I hadn't broken his skin yet. Anyway, now he decided the fight was on. He grabbed my upper arms, cutting off the circulation, and forced me back into a wall. I struggled, but he only tightened his grip. I was loosing feeling in my fingertips, my hands… I had failed. He was stronger than me. It was over.

"Stop," said a voice I knew only too well. An I'm-taking-over-so-shut-up-and-listen voice.

"Zero!" I said, relief colouring my voice. But Zero was far away. He was running toward us. I had heard his yell, and I could tell he was out of breath.

Kain was leaning forward. I knew what wound follow. I tucked my chin down. He sighed impatiently and jerked me forward harshly, which jerked my head back. I felt his lips at my neck, then his teeth.

"Kain, stop!" yelled Zero, and I could hear the desperation in his voice.

"Z—Zero," I gasped.

"Kain," said another, more reasonable, yet still as distressed voice. Louis. "You're going to hurt her. You're drinking too much."

I gasped, shuddered, and passed out.

*******

_I awoke slowly, hardly wanting to lift my head. I didn't open my eyes. I deliberately kept my breathing slow and even. I didn't think I could move. I tried to twitch my finger…nope, couldn't move. I could really use some cake right now…_

_"Louis," said a voice. Lilith. My heart fluttered. What would I say to her? That memory she saw…I had no experience with girls…_

_"Louis, can you hear me?" she asked. I could hear tears in her voice, but I didn't think they were on her cheeks. Yet. She was a strong girl. I wanted to answer, but could I do it? No, I was a coward._

_"Please, Louis, don't die," she sobbed. "Please…"_

_I took a breath involuntarily. I let it out just as quickly. I was _not_ going to speak._

_"I can't stand the thought of you dying," she whispered softly. "You can't leave me. You're staying with me. I won't let you go!"_

_Her voice rose. I wondered why she was so worried. I had numbers, didn't I? Did my life end here? Could she see that? I almost opened my eyes. Almost._

_"Louis…" she said, a bit awkward. "I…I don't care if you…like me or anything. That definitely doesn't mean I won't want to talk to you. I can't…I…if you died…I couldn't…"  
My breathing sped a little. Surely I was imagining the emotion colouring her voice, giving her away. Maybe I was still unconscious. With a little effort, I calmed down a bit._

_"Please Louis," she begged, and I felt her somewhat cold, soft hands around one of mine. "Please…"_

_I wondered if she saw what I was seeing now. She was touching my hand, after all…but she didn't seem to be out…the only way to know was to wake up. Alright…_

_"Unh…" I muttered, opening my eyes and pushing myself up. "What the…"_

_"Louis!" she yelled, and hugged me. Maybe I was still dreaming…_

_"You're okay," she went on, seeming genuinely happy. But I had no idea how good a liar she was. "I mean, I knew you wouldn't die, but it's not always so easy to trust the numbers…"_

_"I…" I hesitated, wondering if she was lying and I was supposed to die. "You talk a lot. I…uh…think I was comatose. At least, I couldn't move, but I could…could hear…" I trailed off, waiting for her to deny everything._

_"Oh," she said, blushing. Here it comes. "I...really mean it, you know. You can love me, hate me…whatever…I'll still want to talk to you. Nothing will ever change that."_

_"I…" I trailed off. She had meant it? Or was she saying that to make me feel better? I wasn't worried as much about you…as my own cowardice. I couldn't face telling you, but you found out anyway…then…I was afraid of what you'd think. But my fear was clearly for nothing. Your heart is pure as gold."_

_I don't know what made me confess. I just know that I meant every word of that sentence._

_Her pale skin turned a deeper shade of red. "I __couldn't imagine hating you…or even…not liking you, Louis. I…I…I love you too, Louis."_

_"You do?" I gasped, eyeing her disbelievingly. "But I'm…I mean…" I was going to say something like 'weird' or 'different' but I realized that she was that too. I was just so incredulous that someone like her could love someone like me. It defied the laws of…what?_

_"I…should go…get some rest," she said a little awkwardly. I remembered how I was like that when she had found out I liked her. "You should too, you know. Class and everything…only I'm not sure you should go, in your state…"_

_"I'll be fine," I assured her, a bit awkward as well. But that was vastly outdone by my happiness. "Morning, Lilith."_

_"Morning…Ryuzaki," she said, giving me a conspirational grin. Then she left._

__I awoke slowly. Someone was holding my hand and toying with a strand of my hair. I guessed Louis, since I had just seen one of his memories. I couldn't move for a second, but I found I could make noise.

"Nnnnnnn," I hummed. "Mmmmmmnnnnnh."

"Lilith?" Louis asked anxiously. "Lilith, are you awake?"

"I…" I found I could move again, but didn't. I felt too apathetic. "Yeah," I finally sighed. "I'm up."

"Jeez, it's about time," said someone. His voice was vaguely familiar…I cracked my eyes open and looked around. I was blinded for a second by the white light over my head. I let my eyes adjust and then looked around.

The one who had just spoken was names Mail Jeevas. Who was that one…Matt, I thought.

"I…How?" I asked, not managing a coherent sentence.

"Kiryu-san," Louis said. He seemed a bit uncomfortable. "He…"

"He blew a hole in Kain," said Matt.

"What?!" I shrieked. "Not that I like Akatsuki or anything, but what the HELL?! Is he DEAD?!"

"No…just…incapacitated," Louis said nervously. "He wont be able to use his left leg for a while…"

I pushed myself up slowly. I really looked around. Louis was sitting next to me on a chair, Matt behind him. Across the room, Akatsuki was on another cot.

"Akatsuki," I said, horrified.

His left pant leg was rolled up, revealing a bandage that was red with blood, concentrated in the middle. He was asleep.

"Wow," I whispered. "Zero shot him…"

"To save you," said Louis.

"I don't understand," I whispered. "Zero hates me…"


	14. Returned

**Heyy, sorry last chap wasn't much of a cliffhanger…**

I had got out of the infirmary later that day. I still wore a thin bandage around my neck, until the bite mark healed. It would disappear quickly.

I was heading back to my room, when I saw a familiar someone in the middle of the empty hall.

"Ryuk!" I gasped, running forward and hugging him.

"Oh, Ryuk! Where were you?! You ditched me for more that three months! I haven't seen you in ages!!!!"

"I've been…occupied," he said. "Can you get off me now?"

"Sure," I said, letting go of my choke hold. "Where exactly were you?"

"I dropped my Note," he grinned. It looked somewhat comical on his over wide mouth.

"Again?" I asked, laughing.

"Yup. Smart kid that found it though. Pretty interesting, following him."

"Who is it?" I asked eagerly.

"Can't tell," he replied, grinning maddeningly.

"Awwwwh!" I whined, still grinning.

"I'll be behind him, it'll be easy to guess," Ryuk replied.

"You mean you won't stay?" I asked sadly.

"No, I can't. I have to follow the human who has my notebook."  
"But I have your notebook!!!" I cried. I didn't want him to leave—he'd just come back!

"No…you have your mother's. But I'll be around."

"He goes to this school, doesn't he?" I asked, getting the idea as I said it.

"Like I said…you're pretty smart—for a human," he said, then left, chuckling.

"Bye, Ryuk," I called.

"See you around, Lilith."

I kept walking. Then, just outside my door, Louis was standing, shifting from foot to foot, looking a little harassed.

"Ryuzaki?" I asked. "What are you doing here?"

"Lilith!" he said, quickly walking up to me. He leaned forward and went on quietly and urgently. "There have been some…problems. Nothing I can't handle. But I'm on a case. The Kira case."

"What?" I shrieked. I'd heard about it—a person passing judgement on the evil, who also happened to kill those who followed him. He could kill a person without ever coming in contact with them, by means of a heart attack. "You can't! You'll be killed! No!"

"I'll be fine. I think. At least I'm 36% sure. But, for you to be safe, I need you to use a code name…not Lilith. To keep you safe."

"Oh! So that's why Mello and Matt and Near…and even you! I get it now…okay, I'll be…Leslie?"

"Okay… that'll work. I kind of like Leslie. But it isn't nearly as nice as Lilith."

"Thanks, Ryuzaki," I grinned. "I'm going to sleep now. Long night. I'm tired."

"Yes," he said, a slight frown creasing his brow, "You should rest up. Good morning."

"Morning." I walked into my room. Then I stopped.

"Oh, sorry, am I in the wrong room?" I asked, feeling foolish.

There, in my room, or what I had thought was my room, a girl was sprawled on the second bed that had been empty in my room. She had shaggy black hair with blue highlights. She was wearing a striped black and red striped shirt and ripped jeans, and she had on a big pair of black combat boots. She was wearing a pair of chunky black headphones, with her feet propped up on the end of the bedframe. She was pulling herself up into a sitting position and lowering her headphones around her neck.

"You're Lilith," she said.

"No…my name is Leslie. Who are you?" I asked wonderingly, just remembering my new name. Then I realized how stupid that was since I already knew. Then I thought how smart it had been to tell Aderyn Luna Sumihane that I didn't know who she was.

"Aderyn," she replied. "Your roommate. Huh. They told me you were Lilith."

I could hear some sort of heavy metal coming from her headphones.

"Nice to meet you," I managed at last.

"I guess you're a vamp?" she asked. I nodded.

"I'm not," she went on. "Apparently they think I'm smart or something. Whatever." And with that, she returned to her music. I went to bed.

When the sun went down and I got up, Aderyn was still sleeping. I thought about how much I'd learned. I'd learned Louis loved me, and I loved him. I'd learned to control most of my visions; I only got really strong ones now. I thought about what I hadn't learned. I hadn't learned why Headmaster insisted that I have a glass of blood every morning—there it was on the table next to my bed. Other students didn't get it. Why me? They all had things called Blood Tablets. Hmm…

I got ready, then woke up Aderyn. She muttered and rolled over. Oh well—the cleaning lady would wake her in a minute anyway.

I went out into the hall, right at the same time as Louis. "Hey, Ryuzaki," I said.

"Hi Leslie," he replied with a conspirational grin. I returned it.

As we walked to class we chatted absently about teachers. Matt, Mello and Near fell into step with us. I noticed that Near and Mello were on opposite ends of the line.

"Hey, Leslie," Matt said, grinning. I smiled back and said, "Matt. And Mello, and Near. Hi."

"Hi," said Mello and Near at the same time. Mello glared at Near, across Matt and me and Louis. Near looked evenly back, across Louis then me and Matt.

"So uh…how does everyone know…about Leslie?"

"I told everyone to call you that. Assuming you never told anyone your story…" Louis was saying. I shook my head. "Good," he went on. "The new story is you were raised in Wammy House without ever knowing your parents. Recently, however, the orphanage found them and they told us your name was Leslie. The teachers will all call you Leslie now. And your last name is going to be Yokogari, which actually means 'side kick', which I thought was interesting…so, Leslie Yokogari, time for class."

We were now in front of the school building.

"Leslie?" asked Hanabusa from behind me. I whirled around angrily. I growled, curling my upper lip.

"Leaving," he said. "I just thought your name—"

"LEAVE!" I said loudly. He scampered off.

"Sorry you had to see that," I said to the four boys who now seemed my permanent entourage.

"It's fine," said Near calmly. "Mello also has an uncontrollable temper."

"Ugh," said Mello, most likely inaudibly to the humans of the group, but loud enough for me.

We walked into the class. I looked around.

It didn't take me long to spot him. Ryuk was standing behind a tall boy with light brown hair. Light Yagami.

Ryuk looked at me and grinned. I saw Light raise an eyebrow, although no one else would be looking for it and would have missed it. Ryuk just said, "She's pretty for a human…"

"Nice cover up," I mouthed. Ryuk noticed. The side of his mouth facing away from Light twitched up. I knew what he was thinking: This should be interesting…henh henh henh…


	15. Separated so Soon?

**Oooh I like this chapter...hope you will too :)**** by the way Ichita Yodari is this random dude I invented. His name means nothing as far as I know…**

Today was Saturday. Finally. A weekend.

I was just hanging around with Matt and Near and Mello and Louis. An ordinary day. Matt was going on about how, technically, to keep me safe, Louis and I shouldn't go public about our little…'relationship', which all three of them seemed to know about…maybe Louis had told them? And just to drive suspicion away, I should date someone else. I vetoed the idea.

"It was a good idea though," said Matt. "Since you're always with Ryuzaki, people will assume things…"

"I suppose it's smart…" said Louis, "But I still don't like it…"

"Me neither," I agreed.

Then I looked up. I had been carefully inspecting my fingernails. I saw a strange sight. Ryuk was standing there, right across from me. I wondered what he was doing here. I slid one eyebrow up a fraction of a centimetre.

"Oh, Light was getting boring," he said a bit unconvincingly. He seemed a bit…stressed.

I shrugged almost invisibly. Louis caught the movement. While Matt was talking, he mouthed, "Reaper?"

I nodded imperceptibly. He sighed, sort of like 'okay'. I was careful not to look at Ryuk.

"Can we do something else?" asked Mello, cutting off Matt. "I just finished my chocolate bar and I'll need another soon…"

"I'm kind of bored too," I said, somewhat relieved that Matt would have to shut up about his brilliant plan.

"Me too," Louis said quickly. He got up from his crouch. I noticed he looked more in place in his blue jeans and white shirt than in his uniform. Same went for Mello in his leather, and Near in his somewhat pyjama-like clothes, and Matt in his vest and goggles. I wondered idly why he wore the goggles.

"Let's swing by the day class people," I said daringly.

"Sure," said Matt. "Apparently being in the night class makes you hot."

"You catch on fast, Matt," I laughed.

"I know," he replied, faking an egotistical grin.

We were nearly there when a man jumped over the wall we were walking next to. His name was Ichita Yodari. He held a gun, pointed at the ground so far. "Lilith Hyukamen, currently known as Leslie Yokogari, you are under arrest."

"Why?!" I asked incredulously.

"For assaulting Akatsuki Kain. Come with me."

Ryuk was standing behind me when I checked. He looked determined. Or like he just realized something important.

"Run," Louis whispered. "I don't trust him."

I tensed. Then I scampered away from there, nearly running into Ryuk.

"Hey!" said the man, and I heard a _chik-chik_ sound. A gun being loaded. I braced myself, still running.

Then I heard a choked gurgle. A clatter as something metal fell to the paved path, followed by a dull thud. I turned around.

The man was having spasms on the ground, gasping. The gun lay a few feet from his hand. The four boys that had been with me looked on, incredulous.

Ryuk was turning to sand.

"Ryuk!" I yelled. Louis looked alarmed. He looked at me with wide eyes, and then pointedly to Mello, Near and Matt. I didn't care. I hardly noticed through the tears in my eyes.

"Ryuk," I sobbed.

"Lilith," he said, sadly. "I'm sorry…I couldn't…give you more…"

He vaporized into a little pile of sand.

"Where did that sand come from?" asked Near.

"Why is Leslie crying because a pile of sand appeared?" questioned Matt.

"Can we go get some chocolate now?" asked Mello promptly.

"Go," said Louis. All three left at the tone in his voice.

"Lilith," he said, walking up to me. I was kneeling beside the pile of sand without consciously getting there.

"Ryuk," I crooned. "Ryuk…"

I noticed the corner of a black book in the sand. I picked it up. Ryuk's Deathnote.

I flipped to the first page.

_Ichita Yodari_ was written in a hasty, loopy scrawl, and I recognized Ryuk's writing from in my own Deathnote, where he had written rules.

"Ryuk!" I cried. "What the hell! Why did you do that?"

I already knew the answer. Why he had been following me. My numbers should have ended today. He extended my life deliberately by killing the man who would have shot me. Then I realized why he would have done that, and why that had killed him.

"Oh, Ryuk," I sighed. "That was the stupidest thing…"  
"What?" asked Louis. He seemed interested.

"Ryuk…he was in love with me. He…that's how a Shinigami dies. They die to save a human. That man would have shot and killed me, but Ryuk…Oh…"  
I was shaken by another round of sobs. Louis kneeled and put his arms around me.

"It's okay," he whispered. "I'm glad he saved you. It would have been outside of my power to do so. I will always remember the Shinigami Ryuk."

"Me—too," I whispered between sobs. "Ryuk…"


	16. Crying Blood

**Sorry I had to kill Ryuk people, I like him too. He's awesome. DEATH NOTE SPOILER: Ryuk is one of my favourite characters because in the end he kills Light, who killed L. L is one of my other faves. So now you know.**

**Enjoy this chapter :)**

I returned to my room with tear tracks etched on my face. I was still crying, so to speak, but all the water was gone from my body. There was a glass of blood beside my bed—I had forgotten to drink it this morning. I chugged it down. AB positive.

"What's the matter?" asked Aderyn, sitting up on her bed. I fell forward onto mine. Funny, I thought idly. I was more upset when my reaper died then when my own father did.

"Ryuk," I whispered hoarsely.

"Who's Ryuk?" she questioned, seeming less 'whatever' than normal.

"A friend," I managed.

"What happened?" she asked quietly.

My sobbing started up again. More tears fell from my eyes and stained my pillow.

"Oh," she said, realizing what must have happened. "I'm so sorr—Are you crying blood?!"

I turned my head to face her, noticing as I did that the tears on my pillow were indeed red. I guessed that had been the only liquid in my body.  
"Oh," she said. "I see. You weren't crying before, because you had cried yourself out…but you just drank some blood, and now you've got some liquid in you."

I nodded. Then I sighed.

"I should…change the pillow case…" I said, wiping my tears of blood onto the sleeve of my black sweater. I would wash that too. With a lot of self control, I stopped crying and began to take off the pillowcase.

A pair of hands replaced mine. I looked up to see Aderyn taking the pillow efficiently out of the case.

"Thank you," I said, surprised. Was this the same Aderyn?

"No problem," she replied a little awkwardly. Then she left with the pillowcase.

She stopped at the door and asked, "Want me to take your sweater while I'm going?"

I unzipped it and tossed it to her. She left.

It took all of my self control not to start crying again. I decided I'd go and see Louis. He'd walked me to my room and then left me alone. I hadn't mentioned I had a roommate.

I walked out into the hallway, nearly running into a boy a bit shorter than me: Seth Loki Yaneko.

"Sorry," I mumbled.

"It's fine," he said, and was about to walk on when he asked, "Hey, you have some AB positive on your face."

I knew he must be a vampire. "I'm Li—uhm, Leslie."

"Seth," he said. Yeah, I added to myself, I know.

"Well met," I said.

"You might want to wash off that blood though," he said pointedly. I nodded and went on. So did he.

I tapped on Louis' door. "Come in," he said.

I walked in and shut the door behind me. The only light came from his computer screen. There was a big W on it, but it promptly disappeared.

Louis gasped. "Lilith! Your face! What happened?"

"I was born this way," I said, grinning wryly.

"You know that's not what I meant," he said sheepishly. "The blood!"

"Oh that," I said, pretending not to care. "I was crying blood. Apparently the blood was the only liquid in my system after crying it all out."

"Here," he said, passing me a glass of water. "I drank some, but…"

I took it and chugged it down. It felt good on my dry tongue and my salty lips.

"Thanks," I said. He took the glass gently and set it on the edge of the computer desk. "You're…okay?" he asked warily.

"I'm fine now. No use crying over spilled blood," I said, grinning wryly again at the vampire's twist on the common saying. "Or sand."

"I see," he replied. Then he seemed uncomfortable. "Listen, Lilith…"

"What's wrong?" I demanded.

"Nothing, I..." he scratched the back of his head. "I…have to leave for a while…"

"Why?!" I demanded.

"The case," he replied. "I'll come back…"

"Don't jinx it," I warned.

He laughed. "Knock on wood," he said. "I'll miss you, Lilith. In the meantime, maybe…we should try Matt's idea. For cover. Just…in case."

"No." I would not date anyone while Louis was away.

"It would make me feel safer since no one would make the connection between you and me," he said, noticeably hating the notion.

"Fine," I replied, "But I won't like it. And no PDA's."  
"Agreed," he said.

"But Louis," I whined, "I don't want you to leave! And just after…after…"

"It's okay," he said, pulling me into his arms. I reached on my tiptoes and kissed his cheek. I felt his heart rate speed up under my fingertips. He stiffened in surprise. I realized that had been the first time I had done anything to prove that I loved him.

I pressed my lips to his ear. "If you're leaving…you need something to remember me by."

"I'll never forget you," he said a bit breathlessly.

"Hey, you get a condition, so do I," I said, grinning. I slid my lips from is ear to his mouth. I kissed him once.

"How did that feel?" I asked, without moving my mouth away. "Good or bad?"

"Good," he whispered. I could feel his sweet breath on my lips. "Very good."

"Good," I replied, and kissed him for real. He stiffened again. But he recovered quickly, winding one arm around my waist and twisting his fingers into my hair. I moved my arms up around his neck and pulled him closer. He helped a bit by tilting his head down. He was easier to reach that way.

_I kissed her back wonderingly. But suddenly she slumped forward. I caught her easily, considering I already had a good hold on her. She was still on her feet, though; a good sign. The complete joy I had been feeling a second ago was partially replace with concern._

_"Lilith?" I whispered._

I resurfaced quickly.

"Louis," I gasped. "Sorry. Forgot to block visions."

I realized he must have been very in the moment for me to have gotten a vision of that. That pleased me. I stood on tiptoes and kissed his lips one more time, but the moment was gone.

"I'll miss you," I whispered against his lips.

"I'll miss you too,"

"I love you," I added, realizing I'd only said it once.

"I love you too."


	17. Trouble

**Aww PDA's are so fun :) **

**So you know, Arigatoo Gosaimasu means "thank you" in Japanese, and it's the polite form of Arigatoo.**

**okay enjoy this chapter:**

Class was pretty boring without Louis…or Ryuk, making faces at me. But I'd lived without that before.

Okay, new train of thought. Uhmm…okay, now I was almost always seen with the three boys that had known Louis.

I was standing on one of the windowsills—they were pretty wide. You could have fit a few people up there, although none of the humans in the class would actually be able to get up to them. I had my arms crossed and my ankles crossed. No one in the night class really sat ordinarily. The teachers had given up about three years ago trying to get us to sit like normal people. Yagari-sensei had only started teaching us a few weeks back, and he didn't care how we sat.

I tried looking around the room. I couldn't focus on the lesson. Akatsuki was sitting on the back of one of the benches with his feet up on the one in front of him. Mello was leaning back with his arms over the back of his bench. I knew a few others were in the windowsills—probably Rima and Senri, since they usually were. Hanabusa was lounging on one bench, and Near had one leg pulled up in front of him. Matt was hunched over, secretly playing Tetris behind the bench in front of him.

I stared for a while at the clock. It was ticking in slow motion.

Finally, _finally_ the bell rang. We were all free to go.

"Leslie?" asked Yagari sensei. I had nearly forgotten we were in Ethics.

"Can you tell me what I just said?" he asked me when I walked over.

"Leslie?" I guessed.

"Before that," he replied impatiently.

"Eye for an eye," I said evenly. I had heard him speaking, I just wasn't really paying attention. But, as a vampire, I didn't need to.

"Which means?"

"For example, if you gouge out someone's eye, the punishment is to have your eye gouged out."

"Correct. You may leave."

"Arigatoo gosaimasu, Sensei," I said, bending slightly at the waist, and hurried out of the room.

Class had been pretty boring—not that it was usually interesting. The first night Toga had been teaching us, someone had thrown a knife at his head. He had deflected it with a book. I didn't look in time to see who had thrown it. I suspected Hanabusa or Ruka, both of whom were outraged that Toga had been impolite to Kaname-Sama. But other than that, class was sort of monotonous, especially without Louis.

This evening before class, and before he left, he had called me into his room.

"Lilith," he said. "I'm sorry I have to leave, and right after…" He looked at me warily. Ryuk had been a touchy subject since his death. Louis didn't prod me. I nodded.

"I got you something," he said. "I don't like to see you sad and I thought you might like it."

He pulled out a small wooden box. There was a small oval of something gold on the top. I ran my fingers over it. Something was inscribed on it, but I couldn't tell in the dim light. I felt along the front and felt for the latch. Then I flipped it open.

I put my hand in the box. My hand met some cool, powder-like stuff. Sand, I realized. I realized then what it was.

I carefully closed the lid, shut the latch, and took the box. But my hands were shaking so much, I put it down beside me for fear I would drop it.

"Louis, you, I…" I hyperventilated a little, trying to keep my voice even. I managed until the end of my sentence. "You didn't have to…thanks, I really…I…"

Silent tears began making their way out of my eyes and down my cheeks. I put my hand up to wipe them away, but before I had managed, Louis had his arms around me.

"It's okay," he whispered. "After…that, I went back when you were in your room and collected the sand. I would have given it to you when you came in then, but I…sort of forgot."

I smiled. "Yeah," I replied, "I think I was going to tell you something, but I forgot that too. It wasn't anything important, anyway. I remembered all the important stuff."

"I…" he seemed a bit awkward. "I'll see you soon."

"Love you," I added, helping him out.

"I love you too."

But he was gone now. And I was left with Matt, Near and Mello. They weren't bad company, but they also weren't like Louis.

And, there was another person (one of the newer people I hadn't met) named Beyond Birthday who looked a lot like Louis, and even sat like him. He made me miss him even more.

I hadn't realized that Misa Amane and Light Yagami had fallen into step beside me. Near had gone to his room to work on a puzzle, Mello was hunting for chocolate, and Matt was most likely off playing video games somewhere.

"Hiya!" said Misa cheerily.

"Hello," I replied.

"I'm Misa," she said, "And that's Light! He's my boyfriend!"

"I'm Leslie," I replied. "Nice to meet you."

Misa looked at me, confused. "Okay…"

Light gave her a look I was not meant to see. I instantly knew that Misa or Light had Shinigami eyes, or my name wouldn't have confused her.

"Leslie," said Light, "I think you have something I'm interested in."

"Sorry," I replied. "I really think I don't."

"You do!" said Misa. "I know it!"

"You have a Deathnote," said Light shortly.

"I do not!" I said. Then I realized my mistake, and why Light had such a smug expression. I had let out that I had one, since if I didn't I wouldn't even know that it existed.

"Alright," I confessed. "How'd you know?"

"No numbers," replied Misa. "I can't see the numbers of others with Deathnotes. And…"

"That means you have one," Light interrupted.

"Hmm," I replied, because I could see both their numbers, and yet, they had notes. Otherwise we wouldn't be having this conversation. "Interesting."

"You do know about the eyes, right?" Misa asked. She seemed a bit cheery to be someone with a Note.

"Of course, Misa," said Light, exasperated. "Her Shinigami would have told her. Speaking of which, I need you to prove to me, Leslie, you are telling the truth. Show me your God of Death."

"I…can't," I replied. He was either going to find out we had shared a Shinigami, or that I had talents. I was in a corner. One way led to my telling that my Shinigami had died, which would tell him it had been Ryuk, and the other way led to my telling how my mother was a Shinigami and so I had a note but no reaper. Technically, in a way, both were true. I needed to lie, but I didn't know if he would buy it.

"Why not?" he asked.

"I…don't have my Note with me," I replied, careful not to sigh in relief that the lie had popped into my head.

"Bring it with you next class," he said.

"Can I see your reaper? How do I know I can trust _you_?"

"Misa," he said. "Give her your note."

Misa nodded. I could almost hear her thinking, wow, he's smart. He didn't give her his note, since his reaper died.

Misa, fishing out her note, said, "My reaper isn't here right now, but her name is Rem."

"Okay," I said. I would have noticed a Shinigami behind her.

Suddenly, a large, skeletal Shinigami glided up next to Misa. She had purple lips and bandages over one eye. The other eye looked like the eye of a snake.

"Here she is!" cried Misa. "Here," she said as she handed me her note. It was unnecessary, but she couldn't know that. I took the notebook. Then I pretended I was surprised at the sight of this Rem.

"She's so different from my Shinigami!" I said.

"They're all different!" said Misa with enthusiasm that reminded me of Headmaster. "Light's is different too!"

I looked at Light. He seemed to be contemplating something, but then he noticed me looking at him.

"What's your Shinigami called?" asked Light.

"Uh… Sidoh," I replied, listing the name of a sarcastic, funny Shinigami I'd once met.

"Huh," said Light. "Never heard of him."

"Oh," I replied.

"He sounds neat!" said Misa.

"Leslie!" yelled Mello, running up. "Come here!"

"Got to go," I said. "See you."

I ran over to Mello.

"Thanks," I said, to which he replied, "No problem. But you interrupted me. I was looking for chocolate."

"Here," I said, reaching into my bag and tossing him a Hershey's bar.

"Thanks," he said approvingly. Maybe I wasn't on his bad list anymore.

"No problem," I replied, distracted. How was I going to find Sidoh?


	18. Friend

**Ohhhh the suspense! Here's a hint: lying won't help you! Well it can but it most likely will get you in a mess. Silly Lil****ith! She's just like L! Don't lie so much!**

"Sidoh!" I called. I didn't even know if he was near the forest I was in, but I had to find him. I was ditching class to find a Shinigami who could be in Russia or Australia or Canada by now. But I needed to find him.

"Sidoh!!!"

"What do you want?" asked a somewhat whiny, sarcastic voice behind me. I shrieked and whirled around.

"Sidoh!" I said, relief colouring my voice. "I'm so glad…I mean…"

"What did you want?" he asked. "I was busy in the Shinigami realm. I lost my note again."

"I…need a favour, actually," I said sheepishly.

"Of course. Humans always need favours."

"No! I mean…it's actually…for Ryuk."

"Ryuk?" he asked surprised. "Why would you want to help him?"

"He…died," I said sadly. "I…wanted to…I can't tell Light Yagami that I shared his Shinigami because then he would know that I knew why Ryuk died because he was with me that day and he knows the only way to kill a Shinigami, and then he would somehow use it against him, but I don't…I think he might get angry too and then he could blame it on me and he could hurt the people that I'm close to! See, it's so dangerous to be close to me! And also, if Light knew that Ryuk died to…to save me, then he'd want to know why. It would begin with him killing everyone I know to get me to tell and end with him finding out that people can be born with my odd powers and he'd use me against everyone…including Shinigamis."

"Uhhhh, so it's for me? But Ryuk died…I don't want to be a pile of sand. Maybe I should just go find my note."

"NO!" I yelled as he was about to take off. "You can't! You won't end up dead because you won't fall in love with a human. I only need you to…"

"What?"

I realized this was asking a lot of him. "I…need you to lend me your note so I can let Light Yagami and maybe Misa Amane touch it so that they can see you…oh. But then…if they could see you…you'd have to follow me around whenever they're there…"

"But I lost my note! And I can't anyway."

"Please!"

"Bye bye."

And with that he flew off.

I collapsed to my knees. If I couldn't show my reaper…Light's killing spree would start with me and end with Louis…with the help of Misa's eyes.

I wondered. It seemed the person who was Kira probably had a note, and also probably the eyes, although he or she was killing people who could probably be found online or on the news.

I contemplated the fact that it could be Misa or Light. I didn't think Misa could handle it…no offence meant to her, but she wasn't smart enough to be Kira. Although there were rumours about a second Kira who sent in a very badly planned series of videos to a TV station.

After a while—I didn't know how long it was, but it seemed pretty long, since it had been light for a while—I got up. My legs were stiff from being tucked under me. I headed back to campus.

I got there in time to see the day class people getting herded back to class.

"Zero!" I yelled, seeing him standing there. "Zero!"

He took one look at me and turned his back. He walked away.

"Zero-san?" said Yuki. "I need some help!"

"Here," I said. I walked up to the day classers and said, "Hi."

Everyone fell silent. Then, "Leslie! That's Leslie!"

I turned and sprinted toward the day class dorm. When I got in, I jumped to the windowsill above the door. I laid flat on the sill. Then they all rushed in.

"Where'd she go?" one boy asked, disappointed.

They all muttered, upset. Finally, they went upstairs. I dropped down and went back to where Yuki had been. She was still there.

"Thanks so much, Lil—uh, Leslie!" she replied. "Wow, I'm still not used to Leslie yet! It's so great that you managed to find your birth name!"

"Yeah," I agreed. "Real great. Uh, I should go…"

"Yeah! Class time for vamps!"

"Uh, I was awake all day. More like sleepy time for vamp."

"Oh," she replied, clearly bursting with curiosity. I was glad she managed to restrain herself. "Sleep well!"

"You too," I replied, and left.

I walked sullenly back to the moon dorm. I trudged up the stairs, not looking at Louis' empty room. When I got to my room, Aderyn was still there.

"Hey Les," she said.

"Hi Aderyn," I replied.

"What's up?" she asked. "Not still gelled about your friend?"

"Nah," I said. "He's probably better off without me anyway."

"Don't say that," she protested. "You're a great friend."

"Thanks," I replied. "You…you too. Going to class?"

"Yeah, why? You not?"

"No…" I trailed off. "I was…up all day."  
"I was just about to leave," she replied, "But I could stay…"

"Nah," I said once again. "Don't let me ruin your education."

She laughed. "Okay. See you."

"See you."

She left. I noticed she had her uniform. She must have gotten it yesterday…or the day before? How long ago was Saturday?

I collapsed onto my bed. I was so tired, I slept without dreaming. The blackness that surrounded me was pure bliss.


	19. My Frenemy, Zero

**You know the drill by now…same disclaimer…blah blah blah…****GUH it drove me crazy trying to think of what to put in this chapter…but I think its FINALLY at least decent…**

I woke up without any disorientation. One second I was asleep, and the next I was fully alert. I didn't know what had awakened me. It was reddish outside around the curtain. Sunset, I figured. I must have slept all night and all the next day.

Suddenly I saw a shadow around the door, but the door closed just then. I realized that was the motion that had woken me up. I wondered who had just left the room. It must have been Aderyn, headed to class. I got up.

After I had turned on the light, I found my uniform and put it on. Hopefully I wouldn't be too late for class. If I was, oh well. I'd think of something.

As I was about to leave, something caught my eye; a white sheet of paper with writing on it on my otherwise empty table. I hadn't put anything on it last night…

I walked up to the table and picked up the paper. The writing was vaguely familiar. This is what it said:

_I'm sorry I'm avoiding you, Lilith. I just can't do this. I wanted to say goodbye, but I guess I can't do that either. Sorry I'm such a disappointment. –Zero._

I was confused. Maybe Zero was moving. Sighing, I figured it was too late for class anyway, and headed toward the main office to ask Headmaster.

I kept mainly to the shadows, since there were a few day class stragglers. I didn't run into anyone.

When I got to the office, I could hear voices coming from inside. I knocked, and the voices ceased.

"Come in," said the voice of the night class president, Kaname. I was perplexed as to his presence, but I pushed open the door anyway.

"Lil—erm, Leslie!" said Headmaster. "Nice to see you. How can I help you?"

Kaname was slipping out the door as I asked, "Is Zero moving away or something?"

Headmaster looked as confused as I had felt when Kaname had responded to my knock. "No, why?"

"Because he…gave me this note…" I said, pulling it out of my pocket.

Then it hit me.

_I just can't do this._

_ I wanted to say goodbye…_

_ Sorry I'm such a disappointment._

It was all so final.

"ZERO!" I yelled, and sprinted out of the room.

"Leslie!" called Headmaster. "Where are you going?"

I didn't stop. I hurtled right into Kaname and fell to the ground. Kaname held out his hand to help me up. I didn't even notice. I was running before I was fully straightened up.

I sprinted toward the day class dorm. I wondered if it was too late. Everything was a blur, but I realized that it was the tears falling onto my cheeks as the reality of the situation hit me.

Zero was going to commit suicide. Zero was going to die.

I sprinted up the stairs and through the doors into the day class dormitories. I pushed my way through the throng of cheering people and time seemed to slow down. Their calls seemed muted somehow. I sprinted through them and up the stairs. I ran so fast that by the time they realized I was gone, I was out of sight around a corner.

I ran down the hall to Zero's room. _Please don't let it be too late_, I thought.

I threw open the door. It didn't bang against the wall, and my entrance was virtually silent, aside from my pounding heart.

Zero was sitting on his bed with a gun in his hand, aimed at his head. I recognized it as the Bloody Rose gun, for killing vampires. He hadn't noticed me.

I ran to him even as he pulled the trigger.

There was a deafening bang.

The bullet lodged itself in the ceiling.

I cried with relief. I had made it. I had pulled up the barrel of the gun just in time to save his life.

"Zero!" I yelled. "I'm so glad you're okay! I thought, for sure…don't scare me like that!!!"

He looked at me. "Why did you do that?"

"What?" I demanded. "Saved your life? I could turn that around and ask you what you were even thinking! Why would you do that, Zero?!"

"Why would you care?" he spat. "It's not like…" he trailed off, seeming to think better of whatever he had been about to say.

"Like what?" I asked, irritated. "Like I would be upset that you died?! Why? Just because you hate me means I shouldn't remember how we used to be best friends? I should just go ahead and hate you right back? I shouldn't care if you die? What _is_ that, Zero?!"

"Never mind," he said angrily, enunciating each syllable separately, and got up.

"You aren't going anywhere dressed like that, are you?" I asked. He was wearing jeans with no shirt.

He muttered something that I didn't catch, but it sounded something like, "You shouldn't care…"

"I _should_ care!" I screamed back. "I should too care!"

He whipped around. "Why?!"

"Just because…because you hate me," I said, carefully controlled, noticing his eyes flash as I said the words, "Doesn't mean that I hate you too. Because I don't. I remember when we were best friends. We would talk to each other whenever we could, all the time! Remember? And you helped me with…my problem. Do you remember that? Zero, we were _best friends_!!!"

"Yeah, but Ryuzaki," he spat the name, "Helped too didn't he. And now you've got a new friend. So you don't need me anymore. If you were smart, you'd have just let me die."

He turned and sprinted out the door. I promptly turned invisible and dematerialized so I could follow through the door he slammed in my face. I flew behind him.

"Zero!" I called. "It's not like that! I still need you. Just because I've made new friends doesn't mean I'll forget you!"

He just kept running. He ran until he was outside, and he was still running. I followed him to a grassy field where we normally rode horses for gym class. I figured he wasn't going to stop anytime soon, so I flew in front of him and solidified, taking the most solid stance possible.

He crashed into me, not being able to stop in time. He hadn't anticipated my move.

We hurtled to the ground, and he landed on top of me, knocking the air out of my lungs. _Jeez_, I thought, _how many MORE times will this happen?_

"Ze-ro," I gasped. "I don't—hate you."

"We've assessed that," he said coldly, holding out a hand to pull me up. I stayed on the ground, gasping for air. His cold mask quickly grew into concern.

"Are you okay?" he asked tentatively, hesitant to let go of his icy façade.

"Fine," I said breathlessly. I was managing to breathe, anyway.

"You sure?"

I nodded. "But please—stop avoiding me."

"Okay," he replied. "But…you know that Ryuzaki and I don't…get along," he changed his sentence mid way through, "So only until he gets back."

"Thank you!" I said, beaming. I took his hand and he helped me up.

"And no more trying to kill yourself," I warned. "Well, I was worried for nothing anyway. Your numbers—oops. I can't tell you! It's a _rule_," I turned my warning into harmless teasing.

"Fine. I don't care."

"Fine then," I teased, "I won't tell you."

"Fine."

I looked up at the tone in his voice. He looked evenly back. Then he smiled. I punched him playfully in the arm.

"Why are you smiling?" I asked.

"When you're confused, you tilt your head like a confused cat. It's funny."

"Thanks a bunch," I laughed.

"Anytime," he replied.

"I like this better," I said.

"Me too," he agreed. "But what about my condition?"

"It's true that I like being with you, but it's not like I don't want Ryuzaki to come back. It really sucks that you won't hang around if he's here, but I plan on enjoying your company while I can."

He sighed. "Okay."

"What's wrong?" I asked.

"…It's nothing." He said. "Race you back."

He was trying to distract me, I knew. He knew I never passed up a race, because I always won.

"You're on," I replied, and took off. Zero's distracted expression distracted tone had distracted _me_, and for the first time, he won.


	20. Names and Numbers

**Same disclaimer whatever yeah here it is:**

I debated on whether or not to go to class. I couldn't avoid Light Yagami forever…but staying in my room seemed like so much more fun. I sighed. I wondered if he'd buy the 'forgot my Note' story again. Probably not. But Misa might, and she could convince him, possibly…

But what if I approached him from the 'I want to help you' angle? If he were Kira, like I thought, he'd gladly accept the help, but if not he'd probably be confused and think that _I _was Kira. Hmm. What a dilemma.

Still, we had Yagari-sensei tonight, so it was a bad idea to skip out. I sighed and put on my uniform.

On the way to class, a brainstorm hit me. I needed to find Mello and Matt, and then Near. Because I knew their real names. I could make them help me.

I eventually caught sight of a blond bob going around a corner, right below the name Mihael Keehl. Yup, there's Mello. Then I saw Mail Jeevas beside him. Perfect.

I ran to catch up, and stalked behind them. I whispered in Mello's ear, "Mihael Keehl, I know who you are."

He stopped dead, and I knew I'd hit a nerve. Mello glanced at me from the corner of his eye, and he seemed surprised to see that it was me.

Matt turned around. "Hey, Leslie," he said. "Come to class, for once?"

"Smoking is bad for you, Mail Jeevas," I said, tugging the lit cigarette from his mouth and grinding it under my heel.

"Hey! Mello, did you tell her my name?" Mail asked.

"No! I wouldn't do that! Are you questioning my loyalty?" Mello fumed back. "Maybe you told her _my_ name."

"Guys!" I said. Both whirled to face me. "I found out on my own, 'kay? Don't fight. But I need your help. I'll explain later."

I left them standing, dumbstruck. I knew what they were thinking: if she found our names, so could Kira.

Now I had to find Near. I said hi to Zero as I rushed by, smiling wildly. He replied with a mildly curious look, his left eyebrow sliding upward, but he would get used to my oddness eventually.

Finally found Near, and I walked up behind him and said, "Hello, Nate River."

"Lilith," he said, turning. "Nice of you to drop by. How can I help you?"

I laughed. "You're much calmer about this than Mello was."

"Mello's a spaz," Near replied.

"That was so un-Near!" I exclaimed. "You used slang!"

"What do you want, anyway?"

"Oh, I need your help. I'll explain later. See you in class."

"For once," he mumbled, and I left.

Now I wondered what I was going to do next. I had them on my side, probably, but what could I do?

It turns out my worry was unnecessary; Light didn't show up to class. Misa was there, and that made me confident. Misa was very trusting, and wouldn't think I was lying. She was easy to fool. Even I could tell that Light didn't really love her; she however seemed to think he did. He was using her for her eyes. Her Shinigami eyes. I had worked it all out. Light wouldn't need her if he had the eyes himself. Of course, as long as we were looking at it from a Light-could-be-Kira way.

"Misa!" I called to her, and waved. I would make her think I was a friend.

"Hey, Leslie!" she replied. I made a mental note to go back to Lilith after the whole Kira thing was done. I didn't like being Leslie anymore.

I noticed Misa sneaking a look at my name again. Stupid name. I knew she couldn't see my numbers because I had a note.

"Misa, why are you looking above my head?" I asked curiously.

"Well…" she hesitated. "Promise you can keep a secret?"

I traced a cross over my heart.

"Um…" she hesitated. "Okay, so I have this thing called Shinigami eyes—"

"Yeah, Sidoh told me about them," I enthused. "Like Light said he would. Names and numbers."

"Yeah, only…" she paused.

"I have no numbers, because I have a Note," I told her. "I know."

"That's not it, Light has no numbers either," she protested. "But you…you have no name."

"W—what?" I asked.

"I can't see your name."

"That's…so weird," I said. The only people—or well, creatures—whose names I couldn't see were animals, because they had none, and—oh! Shinigamis! I see, the Shinigami in me hides my name, I thought. Perfect. I could lie to them and they'd never know.


	21. SOS

**AN: okay no AN this time, just the same ol' disclaimer. Have fun.**

Now what? I have Mello, Near and Matt on my side…but how can they help me? Light might not even be Kira at all…then this would all be for nothing. I'm only putting suspicion on me…then what? What if I get arrested for being Kira? Would I even get a trial? Somehow I doubted it. Even L couldn't bail me would of that, as much as I knew he'd try. I had to be more careful from now on.

I chewed my thumbnail as I walked to class thinking. Then I took it out of my mouth, grinning. I was acting just like Louis.

Then I growled. This was getting on my nerves. What was I going to do? I had to think of this from L's point of view if I was to be any help.

Alright. The only evidence I had against Light and Misa was that they both had Notes. Not enough. I had a Note as well. So I had no reason to be afraid of either of them, right?

But, again, my worrying was for nothing. Neither Light nor Misa attended class that night. I sat up on my windowsill, leaning against the wall with my feet stretched out before me. Mello and Matt kept throwing me furtive glances. Near looked lost in thought.

But finally, finally, class was over. I hadn't taken in any of it. I had been too busy mulling over the entire problem. I figured I could just tell Light that I was too afraid to show my Shinigami because I didn't want Kira to hurt me if he found out I had something so evil, and that I had kept it a secret for so long. Then I would pull the right strings to make him sympathetic for me. Perfect.

As I was walking back to the Moon dorm, Mello, Matt and Near fell into step beside me. Again, Near and Mello were on opposite ends of the line. Mello seemed annoyed that he and Near had both started walking with me at the same time.

"Hello, boys," I said cheerily. "What's up?"

"Leslie," said Mello. "How did you know our names?"

"Yeah," chimed Matt. "No one knows them!"

"I'm not surprised," Near confided. "I assumed you would find out eventually. You are…possibly more worthy to succeed L than even us."

Mello's eyes almost bulged out of his head. "What?! She may be better than you, Near, but I will be number one!"

"Dream on, turkey licker," Near muttered. I laughed.

"What?" asked Matt. "I didn't even say the punch line yet!"

"You haven't said _anything_ yet," I pointed out.

"Maybe I'm naturally funny."

"Maybe you _look_ funny," Near suggested. I laughed again. "I'm going to bed." Then he left.

"Me too," I chimed. "Bye, Mells, Matt."

"See you around," said Matt, to which Mello added, "Bye."

I headed back to my room, putting on my favourite pyjamas; grey pants with red hearts on them and a red tank top I'd found at the mall.

As I was crawling under the covers to hibernate, Aderyn walked in.

"Oh, hey," she said. "You going to sleep?"

"I was going to, yeah. Why?"

"I was going to practise my bass, but it can wait."

"Oh, no!" I replied. "Please do. I haven't heard you play. I play guitar, you know. Haven't had much chance since I've been here, though."

"Cool. Want to have a jam session?"

"Sure. Let's play loud enough to annoy Ruka. She's in the room next door," I said evilly, shooting her a conspiratorial grin. "Know any loud songs?"

"Sweet. Let's see…know any Green Day?"

"I know everything there is to know," I replied, hanging upside down over the edge of my bed. My guitar was collecting dust beneath it. But as I reached for my instrument, my fingers brushed a smooth, wooden box. A box which I knew to contain nothing but sand, and yet it meant more to me than the guitar which I quickly retrieved from behind it, sitting up.

"You pick the song," said Aderyn.

"Oh, jeez…uh, how about Boulevard of Broken Dreams? It was always a favourite of mine."

"Sure."

I strummed my guitar mindlessly. I hoped Louis would come back soon. And safe.

Suddenly my cell rang. I had to look for it before I finally checked the pocket of my uniform on the floor. Aderyn laughed at my frenzied search.

"Yes?" I asked breathlessly.

"Lilith?" asked a somewhat toneless voice on the other end.

"Ryuzaki!" I cried happily. I remembered in time that I had to use his alias. "Ryuzaki, it's been so long…"

"Yes, yes it has. I was calling to ensure that you are well. You are well, correct?"

"Oh yeah, I'm great. Much better now, actually. How about you?"

"I am fine, now. I would like to inform you I will be returning soon. Possibly a few weeks, hopefully in approximately seventeen days. That is, if all goes well."

"What are you doing? You wont get hurt will you?"

"In shouldn't. Goodbye Lilith."

The line went dead. I could only assume there was some (perfectly safe) reason that he had to hang up.

"Boyfriend?" asked Aderyn, grinning.

"Uhh…friend who's a boy?" I said. "Yeah, I guess…"

"Nice," she replied. "I think I'll hit the hay. Sorry to keep you up."

"No problem. It was actually really fun," I confessed. "See you tomorrow."

"'Morning."

I downed the glass of blood on the table before I ducked under the covers and gave myself to sleep.

***

"Hmm?" I mumbled. I could swear I had heard something.

"Wake up," said a vaguely familiar voice through my dreamy haze. But it didn't seem…right.

"Who…" I muttered. My mouth was dry, and tasted vaguely metallic. Then I snapped out of my haze and opened my eyes. The sight that met my eyes was a good one.

"Ryuzaki!" I cried, throwing my arms around the figure hunched over my bed. "I thought you weren't coming back for a month!"

He started chuckling. But it wasn't _his_ laugh. Something was wrong. Then I noticed a sharp pain in the center of my chest. I pulled away to see the handle of a kitchen knife protruding from my chest. Warm, wet blood was darkening the red of my shirt.

"Not…Ryuzaki," I managed.

"No, not at all," he replied, grinning evilly. I fell back on the pillow, too tired to hold myself up. Maybe loss of blood…

"Sleep well, no name girl," he said, his eyes focused above me, and burning red. I realized it was Beyond Birthday, it was only possible. Unless I was dreaming. No, the pain was real. He really did look a lot like Louis. I hadn't known he had the eyes. But he had no Note, he had numbers. How…?

He was leaving, chuckling a laugh that reminded me of Ryuk. Tears sprang to my eyes.

Suddenly I remembered with sharp clarity Louis voice, "In approximately seventeen days. That is, if all goes well."

In seventeen days, it would be the thirteenth of November. My birthday.


	22. Surprise

**Oooh betcha thought it was over, didn't ya? Well you should know by now that Lilith's a fighter! She won't give up that easily. Here it is:**

"Lilith, say something," pleaded a voice. It was deep. It must be a he. Maybe it was God. More likely an angel. Or maybe I hadn't made it to Heaven. But if I hadn't, why would the voice sound like it cared? And it was familiar, too. Maybe Beyond had killed someone I knew?

Then another voice joined the first. "Leave her alone for a while. You've been here for long enough. How would she feel if she knew how much sleep you were missing for her?"

"She saved my life," said the first voice, sounding broken. "I can't leave her."

I wanted to help this voice. Something was tugging the back of my mind, but it evaded me when I tried to reel it in, like a fish that didn't want to bite. Just like fishing. What was fishing? How did I know?

I wanted to make the broken voice feel better, but I couldn't move. I struggled against the red, fading to black at the edge of my vision. I couldn't make a sound.

I struggled against my mental bonds. I struggled and mentally kicked and shoved and thrashed. Suddenly, a sound like thunder built up in me somewhere. Then I came back to Earth. I remembered everything with a rush. It was then that I realized the thunder was coming from my throat. I also felt the pain coming from my wound.

"Lilith!" said the angel. But I connected the voice to a face. The face was pale, and had silvery-white hair and pale lavender eyes. It wore a concerned expression that matched its tone.

"Ze—ro," I rasped, fighting the constriction in my chest. "I'm—fine."

"Lilith! You're okay!" he replied, elated. I cracked my eyes open. He was beaming at me.

"Ohh!" squealed Headmaster from the foot of my bed. I was in the infirmary, I realized. "I haven't seen Kiryu so happy since ever!!!" His eyes were shining and he stopped windmilling his arms long enough to whip out a camera and start snapping, but Zero held his hand out to block the shot.

I returned the grin. "What happened? How did I get here?"

His smile disappeared. Headmaster started to edge toward the door.

"You…" Zero began thickly, then cleared his throat. "Aderyn found you…three nights ago. The nurse said you might not…make it. I thought…"

"But I'm fine now, Zero!" I said, struggling slightly against the constriction. "I did make it."

"She said you'll always have a scar," Zero said. "Assuming you survived."

"Oh…" I replied thoughtfully. "I've never had a scar."

"I'm so glad you're okay…" Zero said tiredly. It was then that I noticed the dark shadows under his eyes.

"Zero! I want you to go to bed, right now! You're starting to look like—like a panda!" I scolded. I had been about to say 'Ryuzaki' but I knew that would upset him.

"Thanks," he replied. I knew he meant about not mentioning Ryuzaki.

"No problem," I replied. "Now, go to sleep."

"Sure thing, mom," he replied, rolling his eyes but still smiling.

I pointed resolutely in the direction I thought the day class dorms were, pouting.

"The dorms are that way," he replied, grinning and moving my arm ninety degrees to the left.

"Whatever," I said, rolling my eyes. "March."

"Feel better," he told me.

"Get some rest," I countered. He smiled again and left.

Seeing as I was alone, I got pretty bored. I tried counting the dots on the ceiling tile above my head (one thousand, three hundred seventy-four) and even tried to make my eyes go in opposite directions. I don't think I got it. I heaved a sigh from my constricted lungs. I decided to see why I couldn't breathe properly.

When I peeked under the hospital-style shirt (only a bit more stylish, for the night class), I saw layer upon layer of blood-soaked fabric wound around my chest. By the somewhat itchy feeling, I assumed I also had stitches.

"Whoa," I breathed. My wound must have been pretty bad.

Suddenly I heard footsteps down the hall. I laid back down quickly, hiding the blood and bandages beneath my shirt.

Adreyn rushed through the door. "Lilith!" she yelled. "You're okay! Kiryu just told me, I'm so glad. We all thought you were dead for sure!"

"I would be if you hadn't—" cough "—told Zero I was…uh, mangled."

She laughed. "Nice word. But anyway, by the time I woke up, the smell of blood was so overpowering, I bet someone would have been in shortly. How do you feel?"

I pondered my answer for a second, before answering, "Crushed. Who put on these bandages, anyway? Must be the same one who ties knots in the US Marines."

She laughed. "Good to have you back," she told me.

Then Mello and Matt walked through the door.

"It's about time you got here," Aderyn told them. "Maybe next time you'll keep up."

"Maybe next time you'll realize you're walking with _me_ and walk a bit slower," Matt suggested. I smiled at the mock egoist look on his face.

"And maybe she _did_ realize she was walking with you when she started running," I replied. Then we all cracked up, me laughing short, raspy laughs. I wondered how long it would be before I could hold myself together without the stupid bandages.

Just then, the nurse came in.

"All of you, five more minutes. She needs rest," the lady said. She had a harsh voice, but I happened to know that she was a big softie.

"Aw, I haven't had contact in three days!" I complained, mock-pouting.

She held up five fingers and returned to her office.

"Kay guys. Five minutes," I said, now mock-serious.

"'msogladyou'realive!!!!" yelled Matt.

"Jeez, Matt," I said. "Chilax! You're going to get yourself kicked out early."

"Sorry. I was under pressure," he replied, grinning at me.

"Okay, how many more people are going to smile at me today?" I asked, exasperated but happy.

"I hope you don't mind one more," said a voice from the doorway.

"RYUZAKI!!!!" I screamed, remembering the importance of his pseudonym. Then I coughed. Screaming was a not-so-good idea.

"Lilith," he replied. "I know I wasn't coming for another fourteen days, but when I heard what had happened, I came back as quickly as possible."

"I should get stabbed more often," I muttered as he slouched over to me.

Concern clouded his face. "Please don't. I nearly had a heart attack."

"Maybe that was Kira," I teased. "But seriously—don't die."

"I gotta go pee," said Aderyn.

"Uh…me too," added Mello after she shot him a significant look.

"Your loss. You're missing out on the last…" Matt checked the clock "…three and a half minutes of visiting time."

"You retard," Mello muttered under his breath. He grabbed Matt by the arm and with Aderyn in tow, left the room quickly and efficiently.

"I love Addie," I sighed. "She's the best friend I could ask for."

"I'm glad you're okay…" said Louis. "But I can't stay long. I have to get back to the investigation."

"I guess I knew that," I sighed. "But please—don't die. If you die, I'll be alone."

"I…" I knew he wished he could promise me he'd be fine. I also knew he knew it was a lie, and he knew that I knew it. Whoa, talk about convoluted thought?

"Just try," I pleaded.

"Of course," he replied, as if it were obvious. He sat down in the chair next to the bed, pulling his knees up like usual. The similarity brought tears to my eyes. I struggled to sit up, and failed miserably. Pain shot through my chest as I moved my torso, and the stupid bandages made it hard to move at all.

"Here," said Louis, pushing a button on the side of the bed. The bed bent in the middle, moving into a sort of chair shape.

"Wheeeeee," I said half enthusiastically, and half sarcastically. I was now on eye-to-eye level with Louis.

I leaned forward and pulled his head to my shoulder, breathing in his scent. He smelled like sugar and sweets, just like I remembered.

"Louis?" I asked quietly after a moment.

"Yes?" he replied instantly.

I leaned back to look him in the eye, keeping my hand on the back of his head.

"Why…did you decide you could trust me?"

"Because you seemed trustworthy. You also knew my real name, and no less told me why. You trusted me first. So it's only reasonable that I trust you as well."

"What if I were Kira? Then what would you do? What if I meant to make you trust me?"

"Please don't joke about that," he said quietly. "I know you aren't Kira. I am 100% sure that you are _not_ a killer. You couldn't kill."

Then I heard a knock on the door. _Another _visitor?

"Come in," I called quietly, with slight difficulty.

The door swung open to reveal Mary Ann Williams.


	23. Sad Reminders

"Mary Ann?" I yelled incredulously, and then gasped for breath. I _had_ to remember not to yell.

"Hello Lilith. It's been a while. Look how grown up and beautiful you are!" said Mary Ann kindly. I remembered her as the aunt I'd never had.

"Thank you. You haven't changed at all, Mary Ann," I told her. In reality, she had changed a lot. There was a new, bitter glint in her eyes that hadn't been there before. In her face were etched lines of stress, worry, and anger. I wondered what she had been through.

Now, however, her face was pulled into a smile that only half lit up her eyes. I compared this to the image in my head of a beaming Mary Ann, whose eyes glinted gleefully as she smiled.

"I heard that you had been hurt. Are you all right? I've been here a while, they just told me you were awake," she explained.

"I'm fine now. And how'd you find out? I haven't seen you in ages!" I asked. Then I looked at Louis. The corner of his mouth lifted the slightest bit and he took my hand.

_In between the bursts of panic, I managed to get a clear thought: I can't let the NPA know anything is wrong. I must get to Lilith, but they must not know. I was glad Mello had informed me, but it wasn't the best time for me to rush out._

_ "Ryuzaki, is something wrong?" asked Matsuda. "You look troubled."_

_ "Not at all, Matsui," I replied. "I was just contemplating the reaper message, and I believe we have no choice but to believe it."_

_ "Really?" he asked incredulously. "But—"_

_ "I need to be alone, Matsui. I have some important business and will have to travel a bit. Please inform the rest of the NPA that I should be returning shortly."_

_ "Okay, Ryuzaki."_

_ As soon as he left, another panic attack hit me. I had to get to the academy quickly. I wondered idly if she had any relatives I should inform. I made a quick search of 'Hyukamen' on my computer. I found out that her mother was dead, cause unknown, younger sibling murdered, and her father had died in a driving accident. Only known surviving relative was her Godmother, Mary Ann Williams. I placed the call instantly._

_ After I had convinced her that I was completely truthful, I buzzed Watari._

_ "We have to get to Cross," I told him. "Urgent."_

_ "Coming, Ryuzaki," he told me._

"Lilith?" said Mary Ann, concerned. "Are you all right?"

"Uh…yeah, I just dozed off, I guess," I replied sheepishly. I glanced at Louis out of the corner of my eye and inclined my head slightly, letting him know I'd seen it, and also silently thanking him.

"I'm glad you're okay," she told me. "I…" she glanced at Louis.

"It's okay, Mary Ann," I told her. "Whatever it is, you can say it in front of him."

"It's about…the notebook I gave you. For your birthday," she said pointedly.

"He knows," I informed her. She looked mildly surprised, but also somewhat as though she had been expecting it.

"I knew you had figured out how to use it when…" she trailed off, unconsciously resting her hand over her heart.

"I'm really sorry," I told her. "I had no idea…but actually, I didn't know until…uh, my Shinigami told me."

"Ah, Ryuk. He was a great reaper," she sighed. "How is he?"

Louis and I exchanged a glance. I called for the nurse.

"Can I go please?" I begged. "I feel fine."

She debated. "You're supposed to stay here…"

"But I'm a you-know-what, I heal quickly!" I said desperately.

After a few more moments of debating, she agreed.

"Ryuzaki, help me up please," I asked, swinging my legs off the side of the bed. He stood and slid his arm around my waist. I stood up, leaning on him.

"I think I can walk," I told him.

"Okay," he replied. He didn't move his arm. I smiled, and in my mind I was rolling my eyes as well. Louis was so funny sometimes.

"Mary Ann, come with me," I ordered. Then, to Louis, I added, "To my room. Onward, Jeeves."

He chuckled, and the three of us trooped to my room in silence.

When we got there, it was empty. I assumed Aderyn was with Mello and Matt. I nodded at Louis and he let his arm fall. I walked up to my bed and knelt beside it. Wincing in pain as I bent at the waist, I reached under the bed. When my fingers met cool, smooth wood, I knew I had found the box.

I turned with it in my hands, setting it on my lap. The metal plate inscribed 'Ryuk' glinted in the rising sunlight pouring through the window. I flipped the latch and lifted the lid to reveal sand and rust and who knows what else.

"Oh," breathed Mary Ann. "Uh…I don't quite understand…"

"It's all that's left," I said, my voice breaking at the end of the sentence.

"Oh," she said again, this time with more resignation. "I'm so, so sorry. How…? I thought a Shinigami couldn't die?"

"There's only one way to kill one," I said, just managing to keep my composure. The corner of my mouth twisted into a wry smile. "A Shinigami dies if he or she falls in love with human and then kills to save that human."

Realization crossed her face. "I always wondered why he cared so much."

A tear rolled down her cheek. "Ryuk was a great friend of your mother's. It's so terrible that…."

"I know," I sighed. A tear traced a line down my right cheek, followed by a mirrored one down my left. "He saved my life."

Mary Ann lapsed into silence. Louis crouched beside me and rubbed my back.

"I have to go," she said quietly. "I only took five days off work; I figured that if you hadn't woken up by then…"

"I'd be dead," I finished. "Yeah, I kinda figured that too."

"I'll miss you Lilith," she sighed. "I'll try and visit soon."

"I'll miss you too."

I stood and, setting the box on my bed, embraced her. She seemed surprised, but returned the gesture nonetheless.

"Goodbye," I whispered.

"Goodbye."

She lingered for a moment, eyes searching in my face for something. Finally, she pushed a lock of my hair behind my left ear and left.

"Well. I had no idea that she was still…I don't know. She just seemed so far away from everything here," I said wonderingly. "I didn't even know she was my Godmother."

"It was on your birth certificate. If you hadn't come here, if you weren't a vampire, you'd be living with her now."

"I wonder how that would have changed things," I asked myself aloud, returning to my spot next to Louis, where I leaned my head on his shoulder as he wrapped an arm around me.

"I wouldn't have met you," he replied. Then he half-smiled at the horrified look on my face; that made me smile back.

"I'm glad I got attacked by a vampire," I declared. "Whoa, didn't think I'd ever say _that_."

"I never thought I'd say this either, but I am also glad you were attacked by a vampire."

I laughed, ignoring the ache in my chest as I did so.

Just then, Aderyn walked in.

"Hey, Addie," I said casually. "Fancy seeing you here."

"Oh, sorry," she said apologetically. "I didn't know I was…interrupting…"

She was about to leave as Louis stood. "It's alright. I was just going."

"Hey!" I protested, jumping up and again ignoring the pain of my stitched up wound.

"I'll stay in town for a while," he promised. "I'll be around when you wake up tomorrow night."

"Okay," I replied reluctantly, sitting on the edge of my bed and resting my hand on the box. Louis walked up and, a bit awkwardly, kissed my forehead.

"See you tomorrow," he whispered, looking right into my eyes. It was a promise, not just a parting thought.

"Tomorrow," I repeated. I caught a flicker of a smile, and then he left. Addie watched him go, and then took a seat on her own bed.

"Wow, you guys are intense," she said. "Like, you're so couple-ish."

"Really?" I smiled sarcastically. "I hadn't noticed."

Then another knock on the door. Wow, getting stabbed gets you a lot of attention.

"Come in, we're decent," called Aderyn. I stifled a laugh.

The door flew open, smashing into the wall. Zero stood there. I jumped up.

"Zero!" I said loudly, careful to control my yelling.

"You were supposed to stay in the infirmary," he growled.

"_You_ were supposed to be in bed," I countered, placing my hands on my hips and smirking at him.

"I'm not kidding," he replied sternly.

"Me neither, panda boy," I replied, almost smiling. The dark circles under his eyes hadn't lightened at all. If anything, they were darker.

"Lilith, you're being stubborn!" he yelled. "You could have died!"

"But I didn't!" I replied, bewildered.

He sighed, exasperated. "I'm just glad you're okay. I don't want you to slow down your healing or anything."

"Zero, I'm—" I was cut off as he stepped forward in two long strides, encasing me in his arms.

"Zero?" I said, my voice somewhat muffled as my face was pressed against his chest.

He let go immediately. "Sorry."

"It's…fine," I replied, more than a bit confused.

"Just…be careful," he pleaded.

"Sure, Zero," I promised. "Aren't I always?"

"Not really," threw in Aderyn.

Knock, knock.

"I am going to _eat_ the next person to knock on the door!" I announced loudly. Then I went to go open it.

Louis stood hunched outside the door.

"Scratch what I just said," I said in a rush.

"That's fine, I…"

Louis was interrupted by Zero walking quickly out the door. Louis lost his balance and almost fell over. I stifled a giggle.

"I was just coming to tell you that when I do leave, because I will have to eventually, you can reach me through this, which I meant to give you earlier," Louis said quickly. He held out a small cell phone.

"Thanks," I replied, taking the small piece of technology.

"I've programmed it with the numbers of all the NPA and my own and the number of Watari as well. You may call any of them at any time should you need help, but do not tell them your name. You may lie about your identity. I don't want anyone who doesn't already know you to try and hurt you."

"I'm always careful," I promised. "See you tomorrow."

"See you," he replied, troubled. I watched him walk down the hallway and closed the door when he passed out of sight. I turned back into the room, the tiny phone in the palm of my hand, subject to my scrutiny.

"Like I said," Aderyn insisted, "Intense."


	24. Bloody Discovery

I know, I should rest. But, surprise surprise, after three days unconscious, I'm not tired.

And I couldn't just leave things that way with Zero. I loved him like he was like my own brother. I hated to see him upset, but something about Ryuzaki just…made him angry. I wondered why.

So I waited for Addie to fall asleep (which actually took a long time). When she had, I slipped out the door. And ran right into Zero.

He had been holding a glass of blood (A neg, by the smell), which had shattered and spilled down the front of his white button-up shirt. He had to collar flipped up.

"Lilith!" he exclaimed, surprised. Then his mood darkened.

"Zero," I replied. "Why are you out so late? I mean early?"

"I could ask you the same," he replied.

"You could, but I asked you first."

He rolled his eyes. "I have to go. I missed the beginning of class, thanks to you. I ended up skipping."

"Well, jeez! Sorry I was unconscious for too long," I retorted. "Next time I'll take care to wake up according to your schedule!"

He frowned. Not in an arrogant way, more in an upset way.

"Gosh, Zero, I'm sorry," I said immediately. "I didn't mean to be so rude…"

"It's fine," he replied sharply. "I deserved it. How thirsty are you?"

I noticed the dryness in my throat. "Well, I wasn't so much a minute ago, but now that you mention it…"

I eyeballed the blood on his shirt and the small puddle of it on the ground, among shards of glass. Zero had some small cuts on his hand from the glass. I was about to tell him to wear gloves (it was starting to get cold out) when he spoke.

"Sorry," he muttered. "I'll be right back."

"What? Where are you going?" I asked, forgetting my reprimand.

"Uh…to get some more blood?" he replied as if it was obvious, and shaking the blood from the glass off his hands. Then he picked out some tiny shards of glass from his palm.

"But…why?" I demanded. "I'll have some at nightfall anyway…I mean, the Headmaster told the cleaning lady to…to…"

I trailed off. I remembered the note that Headmaster had left me saying that I needed to drink a glass of blood before I went to sleep and when I woke up. I also remembered a note apologizing, from Zero, because he could not be more.

Notes from two different people with the same handwriting?

"Not Headmaster," I realized. "You."

He nodded, caught in the act.

"Does he know?" I asked, meaning Headmaster. Naturally Zero understood.

He shook his head.

"So you brought me blood twice a night…for four years?" I asked wonderingly. "But why?"

"Just…never mind. I have to go."

"But Zero…" I trailed off. He walked swiftly away and down the grand staircase. I stood at the top, and watched him walk out the door. It was snowing. I hoped he would be warm enough. I myself shivered at the cold gust that rushed in through the door, bringing small swirls of fluffy white snowflakes into the front hall. It was the type of snow that would disappear once the sun was up higher. Ugh. Snow in October. Hopefully it'd clear up for Halloween. I mentally noted, again, to tell Zero to wear gloves.

I went back to my room. But not to sleep.

I got dressed in a long sleeved shirt with a jacket and a scarf, with jeans and my beat up converse high tops. I grabbed some mittens and as I was jamming my hands into them, Aderyn sat up.

"Lilith?" she muttered sleepily. "Where ya goin?"

"I'm just running an errand," I improvised. "For the Headmaster. I'll be back really soon. Go back to sleep."

She flopped into the covers. I slipped out the door.

My lie had been truthful enough; I was running an errand, and it at least _involved_ the Headmaster…technically it would benefit him…does that mean it was _for_ him?

I shook my head and took the stairs two at a time. I flung open the double doors, and rushed down the stairs.

I slid and fell on the ice that had been hidden under the snow.

"Are you okay?" asked a voice. I looked up. Zero was standing over me, concerned, with a glass of blood in his hand. This one was AB positive. Yummy.

"I'm fine," I replied. He held out a hand. I deliberated for a second before accepting it and allowing him to help me up. I dusted some powdery snow off myself.

He handed me the glass. Well, more like, he shoved the glass into my mittened hands and turned away, beginning to leave.

"Zero?" I asked quietly. So quietly, that if he wanted to, he could have pretended he didn't hear me. But he stopped, without turning. I felt relief spread through me.

"Thank you," I said firmly. "For everything."

He paused a second longer. "You're welcome," he replied, as quietly as I had called his name. I wondered if I had been meant to hear. I decided I wouldn't bring it up later. Then he left.

I sniffed at the glass in my hands. I liked AB positive; it was one of my favourites. I couldn't understand how Shiki didn't like it. I sipped at it as I headed toward the main building.

When I got in, I headed straight for Headmaster's office, knocking on the door.

"Come in," called Headmaster. I pushed open the door, noticing the name Kaien Cross and 3819560 above his head, as it had always been. He jumped up as I entered.

"Lilith!" he exclaimed. "So glad to see you! How have you been?"

"Fine, thank you," I replied politely.

"Is that blood?" he asked with the air of someone about to get someone else in heaps of trouble.

"Mm," I replied, taking a sip. "AB positive."

"Lilith! You know that's against the rules!"

"Zero gave it to me. He's been giving it to me twice a night since I started coming here. But please, don't get him in trouble. He only wanted to help me. He didn't hurt anyone!" At lease, I thought he didn't… but all of the things I had thought I had known about Zero had been wrong. Would he kill just to stop me from going level E? Maybe he didn't want to have to kill _me_ when it came to that. I was snapped out of my thoughts by Headmaster's voice.

"Zero…of course he did. I'm sure he doesn't want you to go level E…but next time, stick to tablets," he conditioned, going into a desk drawer and pulling out a small tin. A smell of simulated blood wafted up to my nose. It wasn't too great, but it wasn't so bad, either.

"Thank you," I said, taking the tin. The school emblem was stamped into the top.

"Good day, Lilith," he bid me.

"Good day, Headmaster," I replied and left. I headed back to my room with my spoils shoved in my pocket, and the empty glass in my mittened hands.

It was cold outside; I made a mental note to get a hat on my next trip into town. I almost didn't notice the sun starting to go down; but, I did, so I sprinted back to the dorm just as everyone was coming out.

"Lilith," said Aido. I growled.

"Hey, calm down!" he yelled defensively. "I just…wanted to apologize. I'm really, _really_ sorry for what I did. And," he added, leaning in closer and cupping his hand to my ear, "between you and me, it was all Akatsuki's idea…"

I sighed, exasperated. "Fine, I forgive you. I can't hold a grudge forever…"

"Yay! Thank you, Lilith-san!"

"Go to class," I replied sternly, but I was smiling.

"Aren't you coming?" he asked. The two of us were standing in the middle of a flow of night class students.

"Uh…I'll try and hurry, but I might not make it," I replied.

"Kay. See you…maybe," he tacked on the end.

"See you maybe," I replied. Aido was too hard to stay mad at, and holding a grudge would help no one. He had just been doing what vampires do. I shuddered to think what I might be like when…no, _if_ I went level E. I knew that Zero and Louis along with Headmaster and Kaname-sama and a lot of other people would do anything in their power to stop me from becoming a level E, even if it wasn't a personal thing; just to keep one less level E from entering the world. I would be grateful nonetheless…that is, _if _the day ever came. Which it wouldn't, I reminded myself.

I went upstairs and into my room. I changed as quickly as possible into my uniform, leaving the empty glass on the table. I replaced my jacket over my uniform and wished that the skirt was longer. I rushed back outside and out the door, sprinting to catch up with the other night class students. But not a single one of them could outrun me, and I caught up quickly.


	25. More Trouble

Class that night had been uneventful. Misa and Light were still missing, and Louis had come in late. I had dropped down from my windowsill to sit with him. He had helped me with some problems I didn't understand.

Now we were on our way back to class.

Matt had roped Mello into a trip to the local EB Games, so it was just Louis, Near and I. Near and Louis were talking about one of the crazy hard math problems we had had, Near arguing that the way they had phrased it had led him to believe something, at that his answer was justifiable. Louis was saying that although the phrasing of the problem had been questionable, it was still clear that it meant something else. I just smiled and shook my head.

I noticed a bit of a scratchy sensation in my throat. I was thirsty, just not for water. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my blood tablets. So much more convenient for travel than a glass.

I almost didn't notice Near looking at me. "Drugs kill your brain," he informed me.

"It's not drugs," I told him smugly, rattling my blood tablet container at him. "It's blood tablets; we vamps use them to keep our thirst down. And, boy, am I thirsty."

"_They aren't _drugs," he corrected me. "And _they are _blood tablets." I chuckled, opening the tin and shaking out the small pressed circle.

I dropped the blood tablet into my mouth and swallowed.

"Thanks for the lesson, Nate," I smirked, flicking my tongue off the roof of my mouth on the 'T'. I knew he didn't like that I used his name. Then I added, "I'll make sure to spell-check my grammar next time I talk."

"Anytime," he replied smoothly. He could really keep his cool in a tough situation, even one as minor as this.

Suddenly I felt a dull ache in my stomach. I wondered if I had eaten too much of Mello's chocolate earlier that night. He had (grudgingly) given me some when he, Matt and I were hanging out before they had left for EB.

"Ugh, I don't feel so great," I muttered. My stomach had begun to ache with ferocity, and my throat felt like it was burning. My chest felt like it was caving in. I figured it was just my stitches and the hole in me. I thought it had been healing nicely, but perhaps it had gotten infected.

"Are you alright?" asked Louis quietly.

"You seem very pale," Near said. "Paler than normal, I mean."

My heart was pounding. Crap. I was in trouble. I wondered what exactly it was that I had done to aggravate my wound like this. I wondered if it was actually the wound.

"Stand back!" said a voice. An I'm-taking-charge-so-shut-up-and-listen voice.

I wound my arms tightly around my middle. I felt like I had swallowed a chainsaw without bothering to turn it off first. I fell to my knees, gasping. Louis crouched next to me. "Lilith," he said quietly, "we have to get you to the infirmary. N, go get help!"

I was now in the fetal position. Near ran off just as Zero ran up. He threw himself on his knees next to me. "Lilith! What the…"

I lifted my chin to look him in the face. "Zero, what's happening?"

"You…you took a blood tablet, didn't you?" he asked, dread leaking into his voice.

"Yes…why?" I questioned weakly. Then I was rocked by more spasms of pain. I clawed at my torso, trying to rip out whatever was causing me this agony. I rolled onto my back, writhing and clawing.

"Move, everybody _move_!" ordered the voice of the nurse, whose name I remembered was Hana. I was slightly alarmed when I noticed I couldn't see names, or numbers above anyone. I had actually had to _remember_ her name, something I had never had to do before. I heard many feet moving away. I didn't hear Zero or Louis get up.

"Hana," Zero whispered ferociously. "She had a blood tablet."

"Oh. My, my, my. We do have a problem, then," she fretted. "I'm sorry, young man, but I'm going to have to ask you to leave."

I knew she was talking to Louis. I wanted to tell her, "No, I want him to stay," but when I opened my mouth, all that escaped was a half-growl, half-moan. I reached for him, but he just leaned closer and said, "I'll come see you as soon as I can. Get well."

I shut my eyes tightly.

I heard him leave. Then my body relaxed a second, and I lay there, panting. Then my muscled tensed and I whimpered as more searing pain shot through me.

"What's happening?! She's reacting so badly to them!" Zero was yelling.

"We have to get her to the infirmary," Hana replied calmly. "Can you carry her, dear?"

Zero didn't respond. He was still kneeling beside me. "Lilith," he whispered. I opened my eyes. They were rolling wildly, but I made them focus on Zero.

"I need you to stay still for a minute," he said apologetically. "Can you do that?"

I lay rigid as a board. Zero scooped me up easily, one arm supporting my shoulders, the other beneath my knees. I was still lying rigid as a board, but I relaxed a little. Then Zero ran. He ran faster than I'd ever seen him go. He might have actually won a race against me, had I not been in his arms, and in any condition to run.

We got to the infirmary quickly, and he set me on a cot. I felt him push some stray hairs away from my closed eyes. I did my best not to move or to make a sound. I just let the pain wash over me in agonizing waves.

Hana caught up a few minutes later. I heard her laboured breathing as she rushed in through the door. Humans…they ran so slowly.

Then I felt something rising in my throat. I gagged.

"Her body's rejecting the pill," Hana said. "Can you sit her up, Zero?"

I felt Zero's arm around my shoulders, lifting me into a sitting position. He was being very careful.

I started coughing, like a cat with a hairball. I clutched my stomach.

Then something small came up my throat and out of my mouth, landing in my lap. It was the blood tablet I'd tried to swallow earlier. It was slightly bloodstained. The pain decreased dramatically, and then disappeared.

"Zero," I said quietly, "what just happened? Why…?"  
"You and I are level D, which is to say, once human. We haven't tasted the blood of the ones who made us this way, so we aren't yet common vampires, or level C. the blood tablets are made for levels C and up. We can't tolerate them."

"So…" my brow furrowed. "You brought me that blood…because…"

"It's the only way to save you from going level E. Actually, slows it down, really. You'll probably go level E anyway. You'd have been level E long ago, otherwise."

"Thanks," I said in a surprised tone, "again. Level E…that's like the man that bit me?"

"Yes," he replied, pain in his voice. "And it's my fault that you'll never…you'll always be…you're doomed. Just as I am."

"That's okay. Like I always say, joy shared is doubled, pain shared is halved. I'm glad you don't have to be the only one, Zero. I'm glad I can be doomed with you."

He looked up at me oddly. "Why would you want to go level E? There's something seriously wrong with you," he said.

"Yep. I know," I grinned. He half-smiled back.

"I should go. Yuki's probably getting run over right now."

"Bye, Zero. Thanks again."

"Don't mention it," he replied.

"Hey, Zero?" I called just as he was about to leave.

"Mm?"

"Where'd you get all that blood?"

He looked at Hana. Then he smiled and left.

"Hana?" I questioned.

"I gave it to him. It's from a hospital in town that has a lot of it from their blood donations and such. They rarely need it, and I can order it whenever it's necessary."

"Thank you," I repeated to her, somewhat stunned. There was more to this woman than I'd thought.

"No problem," she replied, beaming. I stood, resting my hand on the rail of the cot.

"Can I go?" I asked quietly. "I mean, am I…okay?"

She chuckled. "Yes. You're fine."

"I'm sure I'll be seeing you around. Probably soon," I added. "Especially when the ice _really_ comes. I'm the most klutzy vampire in the whole world. So I'll see you soon."

"Let's hope not," she replied, smiling. "Bye, Lilith."

I beamed as I left.


End file.
